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A satirical account of today's corporate and business world. Learn how to not take business seriously.
Recent Posts Tagged With 'Management'
Don’t Let Your Subordinates Steal Your Job
The ugly side of being a manager is the ratio of people fighting for your job. You alone : All your subordinates As the probability of you being an awesome manager is remote, therefore I conclude that you’re not competent enough to be the bes...
A Thank You Letter For Employees
Dear employees, It’s been a while since I personally write to all of you, but this time around, the times are tough, I thought you guys need a lift in spirit. I’m writing this to inform you guys how thankful I am to have such a supportive ...
How To Reduce Employees Absenteeism
Employees skip the day at the office for various reasons. The problem is, some of those reasons are valid and legal. We can blame the employee union for that, but of course you need a lot of cash and a link with a Sicilian family to make them shut-up...
Managers! Observe The Blue Eye System!
Are you a manager? Then you have to follow the norm- pick a bozo from your pool of subordinates, and treat them as your favorite. Because the corporate management arena work using the Blue Eye System, where you MUST have an incompetent blue-eyed boy ...
Ehem! We're An Equal Opportunity Employer
Welcome to Gobloc Insulting, a marketing consultancy firm.We give equal opportunity to every people to work in our company, regardless of their gender, race, religion and any characteristic that may be considered for social profiling.For example, we ...
10 Reasons Why Theory Y is a Lie
For sure you've heard about the Theory X and Y management styles. There's even theory Z, but then I don't think it fits the continuum of the first 2 theories to be relevant.Let's see theory X. Managers who are the proponents of Theory X will ALWAYS a...
What's Up With Today's Employee Titles?
Apparently some in HR field think that by changing the employee titles, they can make the difference.That's why Starbucks don't call their waiters 'waiter'. They slap craps on their name tags by calling these people 'barista'.Or Walt Disney when they...
How To Reduce Office Expenditures
I've been actively preaching that oil prices will drop below $100, but silly me, my 'guru status' failed to shake the future traders to follow suite this time. With the price per barrel is predicted to reach $150 any moment now, it's time to engage i...
Why Business Vendors Are Important
One of the blessing of having business competition is vendors. Our B2B vendors and suppliers.Like office equipment suppliers and food caterers. And also the CRM/SCM software resellers and network platform vendors.Oh, don't forget those office furnitu...
Best CEO Candidate: Marketers or Engineers?
When Carlos Ghosn took the helm at Nissan, he immediately removed top managers who are marketing people and replaced them with engineers. It’s one of his recipes for the near-impossible turnaround success of Nissan. Plus the 500 days a year on the ...
How Companies Could (be) Exploit(ed by) Web 2.0
If you never heard of the term "Web 2.0", then I'm sure your email address ends with Hotmail.com, and has already expired. I got a recent client anxious to embrace the latest digital phenomenon, but sadly, knows nothing about them. So I pinpointed hi...
Job Vacancy: Non-Executive Director
We're a big Marketing Consulting Agency engaged in strategic and tactical marketing consultation. In line with our CEO's request, the company is now looking for suitable candidates to attend our interview for the following position:Non-Executive Dire...
How I Turn Blog Readers Into (More) Profit
I've read somewhere on the net that your blog traffic varies greatly between weekdays and weekends. Yes, weekends produce lackluster traffic figures. If you're experienced blogger, I guess you'll tend to agree with these facts (from problogger.net):1...
Why My Bonus Is More Than Yours
We're approaching the end of the year. For most (some?) of you workaholics out there, you know it's high-time for your bonus pay-outs. So, how many month do you get? Happy? I'm not happy for sure. Because I'm the owner of my company. I've to fork ou...
True Definitions of Corporate Jargons
To join the bandwagon of successful corporate figures, I've decided to write a book5hit. Yes, it's bull5hits in a book format. So, I'm providing an exclusive snippets of the soon-to- become best-seller to you. It's called Understanding Corporate Ja...
Quicker Meetings Please!
The other day I was invited to witness a meeting with the Gobloc Insulting suppliers (yes, we also sell useless products - successfully). As usual, the meeting started late, constantly went astray from the key topics and finished late in the evening....
How to Discipline Your Subordinates
I know some of you work in those upper tier of management. Congratulations. You have everything one can wish for in their carrier life. You have walls in your office, your own long-suffering secretary, a stupid but otherwise stylish voice-command tel...
How to fix your office's copier
Your overhead cost is not going down. Contrary to what you've been promised by the so-called "Cost-Rationalization Exercise", the only thing that you have to rationalize is your lack of exercise due to your loads of work. So, let's make the overhead ...
