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Cooking for Assholes

Cooking for Assholes

http://cookingforassholes.blogspot.com/

I know how to cook; You don't.

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  • Fuck All Of You II

    Posted on Monday November 9th, 2009 at 14:01

    I have cooked and I have taken pictures but I don't fucking feel like sharing so go fuck yourself, losers. I am tired of this dumb crap and even though you hang on my every word I don't give a shit. You think I need your validation? I don't. You mean...

  • Vegetarian Toastadas II

    Posted on Monday October 26th, 2009 at 23:56 in vegetarian, dinner

    So I made these crappy pieces of shit for lunch today and they were pretty darn good. They were also really easy which is why I am giving you the recipe. I actually think you are capable of making them unlike everything else which is way over your he...

  • Smoked Salmon Hash Quiche

    Posted on Monday October 26th, 2009 at 15:11 in breakfast, quiche, seafood

    The other morning my lady and I went to our favorite local breakfast spot, Gravy on Mississippi Street. They serve absurdly large portions so we returned home with an abundance of smoked salmon hash. "Does that shit get you high?" Don't be a fucking ...

  • Family Time - Sauvie Island

    Posted on Saturday October 24th, 2009 at 18:20

    Sauvie Island is just north of Portland out highway 30 and is a great weekend getaway for families and couples. I guess you could go alone since you have no friends but I would not suggest bringing your five cats.There are plenty of farms all over th...

  • Shrimp and Crab Enchiladas

    Posted on Friday October 23rd, 2009 at 21:53 in dinner, seafood

    Okay you dumb fuckers. Since my woman and baby went to visit a friend for the evening I was left to my own devices. "What did you do?" I went to my local speakeasy and got loaded, dumbass. What the hell else would I do? In any case, I am bored and si...

  • Wild Boar Sausage

    Posted on Thursday October 22nd, 2009 at 19:35 in pork, dinner

    So I made this a few nights ago but I figured you idiots don't give a shit and want to hear about it anyway no matter how mundane. I found this wild boar sausage at a local market and it was super badass. I just cooked it up and had some bread and mu...

Comments & Reviews

This blog is currently rated a 4.94 out of a possible 5 based on 47 comments.

mikegx911

5 stars Mike

freakin hilarious. keep it up!

Posted: November 16th, 2009 | More Reviews From mikegx911 | Report This Comment

brianomaracroft

5 stars Brian O'Mara-Croft

He's one funny asshole!

Posted: November 2nd, 2009 | More Reviews From brianomaracroft | Report This Comment

superdadpseks

5 stars gj mR C

Great Blog! I clicked your site and added you! Add me!

Posted: October 13th, 2009 | More Reviews From superdadpseks | Report This Comment

Richer44

5 stars Nathan

This is a great blog! Absolutely hilarious and there are even some decent recipes such as the bacon and jalepeno martini...yummmy!

Great job!

Posted: September 25th, 2009 | More Reviews From Richer44 | Report This Comment

mrcondescending

5 stars mr condescending

Very funny, he lives up to the name!

Posted: September 21st, 2009 | More Reviews From mrcondescending | Report This Comment

MrPoo

5 stars Mr. Poo

That’s just what I needed. This weekend I invited some assholes, and I didn’t know what to cook for those assholes. Now I found some recipes, even I will be able to follow. Thanks a lot

Posted: September 16th, 2009 | More Reviews From MrPoo | Report This Comment

nogueira

5 stars sonia nogueira mossri

It's funny and very useful for me who don't know how to cook very well.

Posted: September 15th, 2009 | More Reviews From nogueira | Report This Comment

TruthThruScience

5 stars Nate

Nice blog - very entertaining. Nice food pics, too!

Posted: September 12th, 2009 | More Reviews From TruthThruScience | Report This Comment

Vidafine

5 stars Vidafine

Great amusing stuff!! Keep it up dude!

Posted: September 12th, 2009 | More Reviews From Vidafine | Report This Comment

tonybeach

5 stars Tony Beach

I 2nd those emtions...

Posted: September 7th, 2009 | More Reviews From tonybeach | Report This Comment

alexinabox

5 stars Alex

Tastegasm?
Yeah.
Yeah I think so.

Posted: September 6th, 2009 | More Reviews From alexinabox | Report This Comment

DianaKennedy

5 stars Diana Kennedy

Fucking cool!

Posted: September 3rd, 2009 | More Reviews From DianaKennedy | Report This Comment

RoflopagosIsland

5 stars Roflopagos Island

hahah this is hilarious...I'm a follower for sho (said in same way Andy from 40 year old Virgin said it. I like grumps and short, pithy prose and the combination makes me chuckle. I agree...I can't cook.

Posted: September 2nd, 2009 | More Reviews From RoflopagosIsland | Report This Comment

tonybeach

5 stars Tony Beach

Cool blog

Posted: August 24th, 2009 | More Reviews From tonybeach | Report This Comment

Theresa111

5 stars Theresa Hall

A cook with a real sense of humor. As a foodie I can readily appreciate the need to share the culinary delights of my kitchen. Even I got hungry after reading. SKDD

Posted: August 22nd, 2009 | More Reviews From Theresa111 | Report This Comment

LolitaV

5 stars Lolita

i love this asshole. he can bitch at me all day and niight and i'd just keep smiling happy

Posted: August 18th, 2009 | More Reviews From LolitaV | Report This Comment

Anniepooh

5 stars Anne

Brilliant! I'm not sure there's any need to elaborate on that...

Posted: August 15th, 2009 | More Reviews From Anniepooh | Report This Comment

DollinNYC

5 stars DollinNYC

Comment Removed by Government

Posted: August 9th, 2009 | More Reviews From DollinNYC | Report This Comment

aspotofblog

5 stars Kate Miller

Food. Only funnier.

Posted: August 8th, 2009 | More Reviews From aspotofblog | Report This Comment

tcinvestor

5 stars tcinvestor

This blog just flat out freakin rocks. Check it regularly or else.

Posted: July 26th, 2009 | More Reviews From tcinvestor | Report This Comment

drjalee52

5 stars Dr.James A. Lee

You know food!

Posted: July 23rd, 2009 | More Reviews From drjalee52 | Report This Comment

drjalee52

5 stars Dr.James A. Lee

Great Blog. Follow me at http://drjalee53.blogspot.com/

Posted: July 18th, 2009 | More Reviews From drjalee52 | Report This Comment

gravity54

3 stars gravity54

love your humor dude!

Posted: July 16th, 2009 | More Reviews From gravity54 | Report This Comment

AngieA

5 stars Angie Alaniz

OK...You know what?
I can NOT give your blog a rating of a 5, b/c it just doesn't do it justices so your
blog will have to be the 1st official "10" rating.
AND I can do that, just ask any of the admin people. ;)

Posted: July 15th, 2009 | More Reviews From AngieA | Report This Comment

basement786

5 stars Milkbar

Funny blog. I look forward to reading more from you.

Posted: July 2nd, 2009 | More Reviews From basement786 | Report This Comment

Hit40

5 stars Eileen

Outstanding recipe blog!!! I love his colorful language that he uses to explain how to cook.

Posted: June 13th, 2009 | More Reviews From Hit40 | Report This Comment

coffeehousecomics

5 stars chuck Harrison

The title and tag line alone gets you five stars! But reading it deserves you 10...if only there was such a rating...

Posted: June 11th, 2009 | More Reviews From coffeehousecomics | Report This Comment

amybyrd21

5 stars amy byrd

Love all the bacon lately and love the humor

Posted: June 11th, 2009 | More Reviews From amybyrd21 | Report This Comment

JonnyDunMind

5 stars Jonny

Too good.
If you are interested in cooking, ever eaten a meal, or neither of these, this blog is for you.
I smiled through the whole thing.

Posted: June 10th, 2009 | More Reviews From JonnyDunMind | Report This Comment

mattyroze

5 stars Matt R

Now THIS blog is funny.

Posted: June 4th, 2009 | More Reviews From mattyroze | Report This Comment

ebeggingonline

5 stars eleftheria akyildiz

This made me laugh today, great blog.

Posted: June 3rd, 2009 | More Reviews From ebeggingonline | Report This Comment

CTVicky

5 stars Vicky

A useful blog with a humourous and warm personality!

Posted: June 1st, 2009 | More Reviews From CTVicky | Report This Comment

gdavisms

5 stars Gloria Davis

You can cook for this asshole anytime
Are you a chef
I love it gdavisms

Posted: May 29th, 2009 | More Reviews From gdavisms | Report This Comment

yourfindit

5 stars YourFINDit

He should have a cooking show. (even though much of it will have to be bleeped out)

I like this blog because it tells you how to make the most of left overs and think you are a chef while you're at it.

Good blog, good food...and drinks.

Posted: May 22nd, 2009 | More Reviews From yourfindit | Report This Comment

Jaybetee

5 stars Jason

i luv it...good food and good commentary. what more could one ask for! Fuckin fantastic.

Posted: May 19th, 2009 | More Reviews From Jaybetee | Report This Comment

tdowney

5 stars Tim Downey

dude, this is genius

Posted: May 18th, 2009 | More Reviews From tdowney | Report This Comment

LisaNYC

5 stars LisaNYC

Hilarious writing and great recipes -- you can't get much better than that!

Posted: May 16th, 2009 | More Reviews From LisaNYC | Report This Comment

ramith1985

5 stars ramith1985

nice mouth watering stuffs!!
Keep up the good work!!
:D

Posted: May 16th, 2009 | More Reviews From ramith1985 | Report This Comment

broncosandbrews

4 stars Jim

too funny

Posted: May 15th, 2009 | More Reviews From broncosandbrews | Report This Comment

maddawg2020

5 stars Jake Bloomquist

I own two Steven Raichlen books and neither has been as informative as "Cooking for Assholes". If the dumb asses in the publishing world would publish fresh stuff like this, they might just turn a buck and people wouldn't walk around saying things like "print is dead". Out.

Posted: May 12th, 2009 | More Reviews From maddawg2020 | Report This Comment

BetsyIckes

5 stars Elizabeth

Great blog! I love to cook also! I am sure this will come in handy for me!

Posted: May 4th, 2009 | More Reviews From BetsyIckes | Report This Comment

KPinski77

5 stars Kate Czlapinski

Love your blog, Asshole :)

Posted: May 2nd, 2009 | More Reviews From KPinski77 | Report This Comment

iyaayasmoderator

5 stars iyaayasmoderator

I appreciate your approach to giving out recipes and sharing with the public. I cook also, alot, and i have quite a few unique recipes myself. Thought about adding a section in my blog or starting another, but the competition would be stacked against me, your blog is just damn funny.

Posted: April 29th, 2009 | More Reviews From iyaayasmoderator | Report This Comment

rajendradhakal

5 stars Rajendra Dhakal

i can cook but after all it will be ready not so much tasty

Posted: April 15th, 2009 | More Reviews From rajendradhakal | Report This Comment

mwaybob

5 stars mwaybob

I enjoyed your blog! couldnt comment on any posts as didnt have a magic account.

The bacon cookies look acetastic

Posted: April 9th, 2009 | More Reviews From mwaybob | Report This Comment

JamCan

5 stars Kristi

LOLOL aside from the asshole part, I love the recipes!!!

Actually I know a few assholes like you, for a minute I thought it was THEM writing this!

Loved it!

Posted: April 6th, 2009 | More Reviews From JamCan | Report This Comment

Jeunelle

5 stars Jeunelle Foster

A refreshing in your face view of a masterpiece.
This dude can cook and I like the way he approaches his kitchen. Well done dude.

Posted: April 6th, 2009 | More Reviews From Jeunelle | Report This Comment

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