Laura Camfield

http://laryislaura.wordpress.com/

My story is unusual, complicated and true. I was born Laurence Patrick Camfield in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. My mother had wished for a girl.
I was an eleven-year old boy when I first became conscious of my overwhelming desire to be female.
It is simple, I recognize, for someone who did not grow up as I did to find this remarkably foolish, if not totally self-indulgent. However, this ostensibly straightforward and unachievable dream kept me alive for decades while also causing most of the pain I have suffered through three marriages and divorces.
Because my mother wanted a career as a ballroom dancer, my grandma took over raising me but I recall the scent of my mother coming home from the dance studio late at night and kissing me. It was equal parts cold outdoor air and Taboo. I’d wake up just enough to see her pretty dress, petticoat and high heels vanish in the half-light of the hallway as she left my room. That’s when I first wished I was a girl.
My desire to be female grew ever stronger when I saw women on television. They always seemed, to my shallow mind, beautiful, graceful and happy, three things I wished devoutly to be. They got to wear beautiful dresses and have long hair. They often had red lipstick and red nails as was revealed to me when color television appeared. I envied their shape, their pretty legs and – I must admit – their breasts. I lusted not for sex with these goddesses but to be them.
I have never been under the impression that I was a female born in a male body. Oh, I wished that was so, so I could announce it to my grandmother and have a doctor make me a girl. I knew, however, that I was not a woman no matter how completely I wished to be. Decades of lies, stolen hours and borrowed clothes brought me to the brink of suicide by the late 90s. My life was saved by a woman who believed in honesty and who supported completely my desire to be a woman. Of course, I married her.
In 1998, in Los Angeles, I finally became the woman I had always wanted to be. My story is not a transsexual journey; I’ve had no surgery and never will. (I have no desire to have a sexual relationship with a man.) I simply began living as a woman, which I have been doing on and off ever since. This blog is my narcissistic way to share my story with the world.
Laura Patricia Camfield.

• Added on: Sep 18th, 2008
• Country: United States
• Language: English

• Author: Laura Camfield
• Listed in: Celebrity Womens
• Tags: women girls clothing change females femulators