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Letters to Professor Genius

http://professorgenius.blogspot.com

Professor Walt Genius is a Professor Emeritus at South Dakota State University. He holds doctoral degrees in Anthropomorphic Sociology, Experimental Medicine, Global Astrophysics, and Economic Nomenclature. He is a member of the National Academy of Science, the Royal Society, the Burger King Kids Club, and the National Council of Bioethics. He received the MacArthur Genius Grant, an IgNobel Prize for Chemistry, and a Teen Choice Award. He has been nominated for four Daytime Emmys and a BAFTA.

• Added on: Sep 6th, 2008
• Country: United States
• Language: English

• Author: Walter Genius
• Listed in: Humor Social Commentary
• Tags: satire advice letters

Recent Posts

• Thanksgiving Sex Advice Week: Giving and Receiving

  Posted on Thursday November 26th, 2009 at 06:00 in greek, peloponnesian war, fornicative relations, repopulation

  Dear Professor Genius,Quick! I need your help! I'm at a Thanksgiving party and everyone just went to the hospital, because my buddy just accidently sliced his index finger off. There was not enough room in the car for everyone, so me and this other g...

• Thanksgiving Sex Advice Week: Texting

  Posted on Wednesday November 25th, 2009 at 12:31 in Bible, thanksgiving, text, fedex, mark twain, aristotle

  Dear Professor Genius, I met a woman I think I like, and I can't really spend time with her during Thanksgiving. This is because she may not know I like her, BUT I do have her phone number. So I am trying to think of the perfect text to send her duri...

• Thanksgiving Sex Advice Week: Aphrodisiacs

  Posted on Tuesday November 24th, 2009 at 06:00 in sex, God, water, Turkey, wind, aphrodisiac, fire, black market, quetzalcoatl

  Dear Professor,The love-life between my wife and I has been somewhat lackluster. Is it true that Turkey is an aphrodisiac, and if so, how much of it could I cook to have "leftovers" for the rest of the year? I'm speaking metaphorically, when talking ...

• Band of Brothers

  Posted on Friday November 20th, 2009 at 05:14 in love, Bible, brothers, oasis

  Dear Professor,I had a big fight with my brother, and he fired me. My only hope for stability was to work for him, and I ruined it. How can I convince him to let me back in? Brothers fight all the time. - Liam from OasisDear LiO,Oh, this is the most ...

• Tough Pill to Swallow

  Posted on Thursday November 19th, 2009 at 06:00 in medical, addiction, drugs, pain, mindy bindy, forssberg substitution principle

  Dear Professor, I'm addicted to pain pills, and I'm not quite sure how to stop it. I don't really tell anybody about it, because I know I can't kick the addiction anyway. I'd rather them have their bliss of not knowing. Can you prescribe me more pill...

• The Test of Time

  Posted on Wednesday November 18th, 2009 at 04:49 in death, jogging, std, bandages, petroleum jelly

  Dear Professor Genius,I'm worried of getting STDs, but I'm afraid to get tested. I feel like I may have caught something from my boyfriend. My symptoms are: rash, achy back, blisters. Please tell me I have something that won't stick around. - Achy in...

Comments & Reviews

This blog is currently rated a 5.00 out of a possible 5 based on 1 comment.

Static

Absolutely Kraptastic! Outstanding example of real humor. If you don't get it then you are certainly too dull, and need to take the next train to middle of Nowheresville and get lost.

One in a million - cannot be duplicated. Don't even try. If you behave there will be cake for the miscreants he calls your brothers.

Posted: November 21st, 2008 | More Reviews From Static | Report This Comment

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