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The Serious Sports News Network is a sports satire site, containing spoofs on the latest news, information and opinions in the world of sports.
Recent Posts Tagged With '2008 mlb playoffs'
Chase Utley erupts in profanity during charity bingo night at retirement home
PHILADELPHIA, PA — Phillies second baseman and all-around nice guy Chase Utley raised a lot of eyebrows last week when he declared that the Phillies were now “World Fucking Champions” at last week’s post-World Series rally. &#...
Obama uses entire half-hour infomercial to talk about Cole Hamels
SUNRISE, FL — In what may go down as the major surprise in this year’s election, Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama used his entire, $4 million half-hour infomercial to make an unusual endorsement of Cole Hamels. “The Am...
BJ Upton plans on stealing 900 bases next year
PHILADELPHIA, PA — Moments after BJ Upton prolonged the World Series by stealing second base and then scoring on a single to left, the Tampa Bay Rays centerfielder predicted that he’d steal 900 bases next season. “What’s the r...
Evan Longoria afraid of spiders, snakes, and World Series
PHILADELPHIA, PA — Prior to this week, Evan Longoria had only two major fears: spiders and snakes. However, teammates from the Tampa Bay Rays report that Longoria can safely add a third item to this list of things that give him the jibbly-wibbl...
B.J. Upton steals three bases and Joe Buck’s heart
PHILADELPHIA, PA — With three swift stolen bases in the sixth and eighth innings, B.J. Upton stole the Tampa Bay Rays back into Saturday night’s World Series game, and, more importantly, stole the heart of Fox baseball announcer Joe Buck....
Paris Hilton keeps asking boyfriend Benji Madden for tickets to World Series
HOLLYWOOD, CA — Blonde bombshell Paris Hilton has her boyfriend quite confused. Benji Madden, who is the guitarist for Good Charlotte, has been dating Hilton for months, and has been asked to perform many unusual requests. However, Madden repor...
Rays forfeit first game of World Series
TAMPA BAY, FL — In an unusual move, the Tampa Bay Rays have officially forfeited the first game of the 2008 World Series, under the provision that Phillies pitcher Cole Hamels would not start game two of the series. “We figured we have no...
Local man catches self accidentally rooting for Red Sox; pukes on new couch
TERRE HAUTE, IN — Local consultant John DeWitte was just sitting around on Thursday night, catching a little baseball while his wife Stephanie napped on the couch next to him. By all measures, the evening was progressing like a normal Thursday ...
Rays heading to Tampa for game one of World Series anyway
TAMPA BAY, FL — The Tampa Bay Rays flew home early this morning, celebrating as they plan on starting the World Series at home next Wednesday, even though they lost last night’s game. “C’mon, we all know we won that game,̶...
God apologizes to Jews for scheduling Yom Kippur during Hamels start
PHILADELPHIA and HEAVEN — A remorseful God, already reeling from a very taxing Day of Atonement, issued a tearful apology to the world’s Jews for a scheduling snafu which saw many Jews forced to make difficult decisions between their reli...
