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Victorya Chase Goes to Therapy

Victorya Chase Goes to Therapy

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A couple years ago I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) caused by a violent childhood. This is my journey, not to 'normal' but to 'ME.'

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Recent Posts Tagged With 'fear'

  • Owning Your Shadow

    Posted on Tuesday January 8th, 2008 at 13:59 in mother, fear, strength

    Recently, while cleaning my house I found this book, Owning Your Shadow by Robert Johnson. It was a Harper Collins book, so I figure I most have nabbed it while I did a rotation through there. They had a great benefit (if lousy pay) and that was in t...

  • So Much To Say, So Little Focus

    Posted on Monday August 27th, 2007 at 08:16 in anxiety, mother, fear, ptsd, grandmother

    Photo by Anthony M. from Rome, ItalyI haven’t answered my doorbell (actually, more like a buzzer. Or, more appropriately, like that part in Dumb and Dumber when Jim Carey makes the most annoying sound in the world, that’s my doorbell) in maybe a...

  • Dealing With PTSD Symptoms

    Posted on Thursday August 9th, 2007 at 08:24 in therapy, symptoms, fear, ptsd

    This was asked of me recently, how to handle it now that I’ve got it. To keep the monster at bay, as it were. During the worst of it I have ended up on the phone with my therapists crying uncontrollably as she walks me through breathing exercises....

  • The Cats Of My Life: Yentl

    Posted on Monday August 6th, 2007 at 08:05 in mother, fear, brother

    Picture from commons.wikimedia.orgAfter Georgie died my mother was adrift without an anchor. She had had that cat for so much of her life. It was a devastating blow. But, we were in touch with a woman my mother at one time said was her sister, th...

  • Three Strikes and You're Out

    Posted on Wednesday July 18th, 2007 at 20:02 in fear, ptsd, trauma, explosion

    Picture taken from cellphone, making rounds on the internet, of a place a lot farther away than I was.Three guesses where I work. Yup, there. I was on the phone arranging for a computer lab for my class when the lights flickered. I heard a low rumbl...

  • The Cats of My Life: Allie

    Posted on Wednesday July 18th, 2007 at 05:38 in mother, fear, shame, past, guilt

    I think I was in sixth grade when I got Allie. It was a big deal. Our previous cat (who I haven’t talked about yet) had died and I’m not sure if we had gotten Cleo yet or not. My mother had a friend at work who ran a rescue group, and for the fir...

  • It’s Not Paranoia if They’re Really After You

    Posted on Monday July 16th, 2007 at 05:29 in fear, ptsd, paranoia, brother

    Shortly after I changed my name I decided to try one last time with my brother. I don’t know what possessed me to tell him. He knew I lived in New York City, although he never visited, citing excuses such as, “You are living in Gomorrah and I wil...

  • Dentists

    Posted on Monday July 9th, 2007 at 08:12 in mother, dentist, fear, flashback

    The other day I went to the dentist. I can’t stand the dentist. It’s such a harrowing experience each and every time I go – which of course means I have to go often. Bad teeth. I’m on my third root canal.The first time I went to the dentist o...

  • Tell Me Why It's So Hard

    Posted on Saturday July 7th, 2007 at 21:05 in mother, fear, ptsd, jumpy

    It’s not the prospect of writing everyday. It’s that everyday I write I think she might find out.The other day, at work, this guy scared me. I’ve been jumpier. He came up behind me and asked me a question and I couldn’t form an answer, my hea...

  • Gynecologist’s Visit

    Posted on Tuesday June 26th, 2007 at 07:27 in doctor, fear, ptsd, flashback

    If any guys read this, here’s your chance to turn back. Not that I’ll be graphic.Since I’m thirty, I decided to bit the bullet and get the full check-up. I don’t know why thirty is the magic age, well, okay, I know part of it. Thirty is th...

  • Fear

    Posted on Tuesday June 19th, 2007 at 07:48 in motherhood, fear, ptsd, childhood abuse

    This one is going to be hard to write. Even before the blog I've been afraid to talk about the root of my PTSD, about my family life. The more I write, the more I ruminate about it, and the more scared I become that something bad will come out of t...