I got this in an email and just had to share it.


Posted to Craig's List Personals:

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in
Downtown Savannah night before last.

Date:
2009-03-23, 3:43 AM EST

I was the guy with the black Burberry
jacket that you demanded I hand over,shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend. You also asked for my
girlfriend's purse and earrings. I hope you somehow come across this
message. I'd like to apologize. I didn't expect you to
crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my
jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a reason
that evening ----and it wasn't that cold outside.
You see, my girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model
1911 .45 ACP pistol last Christmas, and we had just picked
up a shoulder holster for it that evening....Beautiful
timing, eh? It's a very

intimidating weapon when pointed at
your head, isn't it? I know it probably wasn't a great deal
of fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that
brown BLOB flopping about in your pants. I'm sure it was
even worse since you also ended up leaving your shoes
,cellphone,and wallet with me. I couldn't have you calling
up any of your buddies to come help you try to mug us
again.
I took the liberty of calling your mother, or "Momma" as you
had her listed in your cell,and explaining to her your
situation. I also bought myself and four other people in the
gas station this morning a tank full of gas on your credit
card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and
was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to one of
the homeless guys over by Vinnie Van Go Go's,along with
all of the cash in your wallet. I threw the wallet in a fancy
pink "pimp mobile"

parked at the curb after I broke the
windshield and side window out and keyed the drivers side. I
called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cellphone.
They'll be on your bill in case you'd like to know
which ones. T-Mobile just shut down the line, and I've only
had the phone for a little over a day now, so I don't know
what's going on with that. I hope they haven't permanently
cut off your service. I only could get in two
threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to
the FBI with it.
The FBI guy was really pissed and we had a long chat
(I guess while he traced the number).

I'd also like to apologize for not killing you and instead
making you walk back home humiliated. I'm hoping that you'll
reconsider your choice of path in life. Next time you might
not be so

lucky.. - Alex

P.S. Remember this motto...... an armed society
is a polite society!

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