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Do you believe you can cheat-proof relationship?

Posted by mizzeboni • 7/14/09 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: advice, fidelity, love, relationships

I just did a post on my blog about this in regards to an article I read in Cosmo (yeah, THEY have great relationship advice). They geared it toward women cheat-proofing their relationship. I took the stance on there is NO way to cheat-proof a relationship from the woman's side (read my blog for the full version @ youspeakonit.blogspot.com) and why is it that all these things are geared toward women trying to cheatproof their relationship and not men?

So I want to know, is there a way to cheatproof your relationship? And do you think that all advice to do so is geared toward women?

User Comments

7/14/09

RudrakshRudranjali

yes...

[reply]
1. 7/14/09
  
  marketborn
  
  no
2. 7/14/09
  
  namidani
  
  hmm but sometimes so fun...in short term but in the long run is so distinguishing especially when you love your partner then forget the love one which really love us...say no too cheat-proof!!!
  
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7/14/09

writings

i agree, you cant cheat proof your relationship, what a ridiculous concept.. hah!!

[reply]
7/14/09

marketborn

allow me to get philosophic for a moment.
hem hem ...
considering the general idea that people do not marry their soulmates all the time or sleep with their soul mates even half the time there should be an opening for cheating so that you can actually unite with ur soul mate by cheating the spare.

[reply]
7/14/09

bettieblogger

@marketborn

I'm not sure this would work... Say you do cheat on the person your with currently and meet that "soulmate". How do you possibly start an honest relationship with this new person when it is based on deceit from the word go?

Soulmate or not .. if your already a cheater then I personally would go looking for my other soulmates .. maybe this is why they say we have more than one?

[reply]
7/14/09

stellak

I think there are ways to make your relationship stronger and healthier but theres a lot of temptation out there. Infidelity is always a possibililty. Cosmo should stick to useless sex advice.

[reply]
1. 7/14/09
  
  mizzeboni
  
  hahhahahahah.. THANK YOU!! its always a bunch of BS but its my guilty pleasure..
7/14/09

melindaville

A person cannot stop another person from cheating; however, you can go halfway by making a commitment to never cheat yourself. I would not marry a person that I believed would cheat on me-and if he did, that would most definitely be the end of our marriage.

My first husband cheated on me--and with one of my best friends. I was devastated by this. I walked in one day to find them in our bed. And he used to constantly accuse me of screwing around--he was SO jealous and I never once cheated on him. Our was a messed up relationship--we were both junkies at the time and because he took care of me and provided me with heroin, I ended up forgiving him (and he died a couple of years later) but our relationship was never the same afterward. I think (hope) I would have ended up leaving him if he hadn't died, although it's hard to say for certain.

I do know that his death might have saved my own life. We were so bad for each other.

[reply]
1. 7/14/09
  
  mizzeboni
  
  o my god! that is so sad. I mean, my god, to go through all that with one person really shows how strong you are as a person. I admire that greatly! wow..
2. 7/14/09
  
  melindaville
  
  Thank you.
7/14/09

timethief
A person cannot stop another person from cheating; however, you can go halfway by making a commitment to never cheat yourself. I would not marry a person that I believed would cheat on me-and if he did, that would most definitely be the end of our marriage.
[reply]
7/14/09

mizzeboni

I see you guys comments and appreciate them greatly. I think that some of you guys are saying that you can cheatproof a relationship are looking at it as THAT person has to resolve in themselves that they are not going to cheat. And that is EXACTLY what I was saying in my blog. Thank u guys for commenting..thank you

[reply]
1. 7/14/09
  
  timethief
7/14/09

LolitaV

cheatproof 101:
cut off your partners genitals and remove their eyes.
chain them to a metal chair 24/7 don't forget the diapers and soup.

[reply]
7/14/09

noetic

Also, if it's a completely open relationship, then it is already cheat-proof.

[reply]
1. 7/14/09
  
  timethief
  
  Agreed!
7/14/09

SweetViolet

You cannot control another person, only yourself. You cannot stop another person from cheating, but you can make sure that you choose a partner who is honourable and ethical (as opposed to "hot" and "cute") and thereby reduce your risk of having a relationship with someone who will cheat on you.

[reply]
1. 7/14/09
  
  mizzeboni
  
  i think that is why a lot of people find themselves in meaningless relationships where they want to cheat, they have simply fallen for looks without depth and wonder why its not working. If u are lookin for a one-night stand then go ahead and go all out for looks but in long-term relationships that is only a part of it
2. 7/14/09
  
  SweetViolet
  
  Agreed...we sprint to the altar with the first hottie who will have us, only to wake up down the line feeling disappointed because her big silicone boobs or his six-pack is no longer enough.
  
  My grandfather used to say "Too soon old, too late smart."