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At work, we recently got this email spam headline:

Elton John Dies in Rocket Ship

So, being the dudes that we are, we went spinning on this and came up with more rock star death headlines:

John Mellencamp Crushed by Pink House

Jon Bon Jovi Found Shot Through the Heart

Bob Dylan Flattened by Rolling Stone

Oh, yes...I have more...but this is just to start the ball rolling...go ahead, give it a whirl!

Note: Most of you know that spam headlines take all kinds of approaches to get you to open up the email and click.

Reply

User Comments

  1. weblogian
    What???????
  2. TheBigRuski
    Don't be shy...

    Here's 2 more:

    Otis Redding Found Floating Under Dock by the Bay

    Ringo Starr Dies in Yellow Submarine
    1. weblogian
      can we know who is sending this.
    2. TheBigRuski
      Where I work, we get tons of spam email that we have to manually delete every day. This is nothing new in the way of spam headlines...we just someday want to do a feature on "Bizarre Spam Headlines".
    3. DeadRooster
      Why must everyone die?
  3. weblogian
    I have many ways for those spammer. Lately no spam mail, these days.
  4. TimMc
    Good Stuff TBR!

    How about "Eric Clapton was Shot by the Sheriff Earlier Today"
    1. TheBigRuski
      Getting there!
  5. Nomadic
    How about: Penis enlargement will improve your life

    Tis the type of spam I seems to get.
    1. TheBigRuski
      Didn't want to go there...we get a lot more unique ones than the one you mention...I chose this topic because it was a bit less vulgar.
    2. Nomadic
      Apologies for being so base - I shall vacate the room
    3. TheBigRuski
      No apologies needed!
    4. Nomadic
      No you are right. I get carried away sometimes. I blame the wine. And the ungodly hour. I should be in bed.
    5. TheBigRuski
      Where are you? (And what's your sign?)
    6. Nomadic
      Eh? Rural Hertfordshire, England. You can guess my sign I am sure....
    7. TheBigRuski
      I'm not into astrological signs...I was teasing.
    8. Nomadic
      Sorry. I'm English. Pretty straightforward. I am also off to bed. Night night.
    9. TheBigRuski
      Bloody well, then!
  6. weblogian
    Last week a got a email proposal from Africa asking to find them a house for them as they cannot live due to many crisis in their country. I told them i could only trust them if they rang me up. I gave the public phone no that hangs near our cyber cafe. So he rang me up the next day.

    I told him at the end to visit my blog to equip himself more to effective spamming and frauds
    Then he hung up.
    1. TheBigRuski
      Too funny!
  7. TimMc
    James Taylor killed by Steamroller
  8. TimMc
    Gordon Lightfoot dies in the shipwreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald
  9. TimMc
    The Doobie Brothers drowned in Black Water

    Okay, I'm done for now...
    1. TheBigRuski
      That would be "Doobie Brothers Drown in Black Water"
    2. TimMc
      Thanks for correcting me (I'm an editor, hahaha).
  10. GrayFoxDown
    Robert Di Niro Struck By Taxi
    1. TheBigRuski
      Rock stars!
  11. GrayFoxDown
    Danny DiVito Also Struck By Taxi
    1. TheBigRuski
      Rock stars! It's a lyrical/song tie-in!
    2. roastfrog
      Unoriginal but...
      "Joni Mitchell hit by Big Yellow Taxi"
      --> Perhaps this one would be more to your liking?
  12. Anok
    J.P.Richardson, strangled with Chantilly Lace, ponytailed women are suspect.
  13. robertstevenson
    Ann and Nancy Wilson bitten in the heart by a barracuda.

    Elvis Presley mutilated by a hound dog.

    Led Zepplin's Robert Plant dies falling off the stairway to heaven.

    All of ACDC die in the bus crash on the highway to hell.

    Simon and Garfunkle fall 900 ft off the bridge over trouble water - there were no survivors.

    Roger Daltrey has a heart attack singing I hope I die before I get old for the last time.
    1. TheBigRuski
      I knew you'd pull through RS! Good ones!
    2. robertstevenson
      Thanks - that was fun.
    3. TheBigRuski
      Edit:

      AC/DC Bus Crashes on Highway to Hell
  14. GrayFoxDown
    London: Warren Zevon Attacked By Werewolf (yes, I know he's dead)
    1. TheBigRuski
      Good one!
  15. TheBigRuski
    Paul McCartney Found Living Then Left to Die

    Cat Stevens Run Over by Peace Train
  16. GrayFoxDown
    Great Thread, BigRuski. This one could certainly go on forever. Thanks.
  17. junbitoy
    Bryan Adams rescued from the mire!
  18. TheBigRuski
    You guys need help!

    More:

    Tom Petty Falls to Death

    Roger Waters has Collision with Wall

    Pete Townshend Crashes Magic Bus
    1. junbitoy
      "Rescue me from the mire"
      is the opening lyrics for
      Bryan Adam's song Rescue me!
    2. TheBigRuski
      Thanks! I did not know that!
  19. robertstevenson
    Pat Benatar died after serenading Mike Tyson with Hit me with your best shot.

    The cutting crew just died in your arms tonight.
    1. kdawg68
      OMFG - died in your arms tonight. Classic!!!!!!
  20. GrayFoxDown
    Pink Floyd Collides With Wall...Rendered "Uncomfortably" Numb
    1. TheBigRuski
      The whole band?
  21. GrayFoxDown
    David Gilmour Survives: Experiencing Momentary Lapse Of Reason
    1. TheBigRuski
      A little lengthy...but good!
  22. kellybax
    Don Henley killed by girlfriend because all she wants to do is dance and he wouldn't let her

    That was weak.... I will get warmed up!
    1. TheBigRuski
      Henley Poisoned by Fairy Tales
      Lawyers Dwell on Small Details
    2. kdawg68
      -Don Henley killed wearing dirty laundry. Mother reportedly mortified.
    3. TheBigRuski
      Henley Found Under Pile of Dirty Laundry
    4. TheBigRuski
      Nicks, Henley Discovered Bound in Leather and Lace
    5. kellybax
      You boys put me to shame!

      Joe Walsh died from life being too good and wandering around his mansion and not being able to find the door.

      Glenn Frye killed because apparently...he did NOT belong to/in the city.
    6. TheBigRuski
      Henley's Bad Heart of the Matter Ends Eagles Long Run
  23. TimMc
    Joe Walsh shot by an Ordinary Average Guy
    1. kellybax
      Timothy B. Schmidt died mysteriously and I can't tell you why
  24. mizhelena
    dang this all reminds me of those dickee (but ohh so hillarious) book title jokes... u no like "Ten Steps To The Toliet" by Will E. Makit.. lol... sorry its early and my kefalaki needs a rest.. lol
  25. focusorganic
    Anthony Kiedis Perishes in Aeroplane Crash
    1. kdawg68
      oh good one -

      Keidis found slain under the bridge.
    2. focusorganic
      Ha, I was trying to think of an under the bridge one, but when I thought of bridge, I thought of troll, and couldn't get that out of my head.

      Axl Rose Murdered in Paradise City By Pretty Girl
      Body of Axl Rose Discovered, Nothing But Dust N'Bones
  26. kdawg68
    Some bad ones:

    -Bon Jovie overdoses on bad medicine
    -Bob Marley executed after confessing "I shot the sherriff."
    -Annie Lenox dies from walking on broken glass
    -Sebastian Bach elects suicide rather than face "18 and life."
    -Cherly Crow dies in accident on Santa Monica Blvd.
    -Alice Cooper mistakenly swallows poison
    -Years of "smoking in the boys room" leads to lung cancer for Poison frontman Bret Michaels.
    -Kip Winger shot by angry father who insists about daughter "she's only seventeen!"
    1. TheBigRuski
      Marley, Lenox, and Crow are excellent!
  27. kellybax
    Warrant's lead singer dies of obesity after eating too much sweet cherry pie
    1. kdawg68
      damn you - I was trying to think of a Warrant one!
  28. TimMc
    E.L.O. band members found to be victims of Strange Magic by an Evil Woman
  29. TimMc
    Jeff Lynne bankrupt after being wooed by a Sweet Talkin' Woman (E.L.O. frontman)
  30. TheBigRuski
    Springsteen Dies in the USA
    1. TimMc
      you should add "in a Pink Cadillac"
    2. TheBigRuski
      Springsteen's Killer Escapes in Brilliant Disguise
    3. TheBigRuski
      Springsteen Dies Trying To Prove it All Night
  31. kdawg68
    Tom Petty leaps from window in bird costume- plummets to death 12 stories below. Tells friends he was "learning to fly."
    1. TheBigRuski
      That's a lead...not a headline! But good nevertheless!
  32. kellybax
    Stevie Nicks taken by the wind... or was it really Rhiannon who did it?
    1. kdawg68
      Nicks takes life with ice pick. Claims never lived to see "seven wonders."

      Edit: Inferno claims life of legend Nicks. Call to 911 claimed "rooms on fire."
    2. kellybax
      Stevie Nicks falls to her death after jumping into Silver Springs
    3. TheBigRuski
      NOW you are warmed up!
  33. focusorganic
    Britney Spears Sent From Above, Plummets to Death
  34. kellybax
    Billy Joel still alive because only the good die young!
  35. GrayFoxDown
    Jefferson Airplane Collides With Starship
    1. TheBigRuski
      That's a winner!
  36. TimMc
    Boston band founder, Tom Scholz dies on highway, trying to Hitch a Ride.
  37. TimMc
    Big Shot Billy Joel arrested in Allentown with Uptown Girl.
    1. TheBigRuski
      Another great one!
  38. kellybax
    Seals and Croft hurled in air while enjoying a summer breeze that produced a tornado
  39. TimMc
    America band member, Gerry Buckley, trampled to death by A Horse with No Name
    1. kellybax
      or was it Kdawg pretending to have no name????
    2. TheBigRuski
      Journalistically, it would be:

      America's Buckley Trampled by Horse With No Name
    3. TimMc
      I was hoping KDawg would come along and confess...
    4. kdawg68
      I'm just glad the authorities haven't found any suspects.
  40. focusorganic
    Jimi Hendrix Lost in Room Full of Mirrors
  41. GrayFoxDown
    Buffalo Overrun Springfield
  42. TimMc
    Cheap Sunglasses Result in Vision Loss for Billy Gibbons (ZZ Top)
  43. kellybax
    Def Leppard dies of "hysteria" after an "animal" attacked trying to prove "love bites"
    1. kdawg68
      Yes!!!!!!!! A trifecta of "hearing impaired predatory cat."
  44. focusorganic
    Elvis Crushed by Jailhouse Rock
    Elvis Dead, Shot in the Ghetto

    I suck at this game, but it's still fun
  45. TimMc
    Trying to find a good one for Billy Idol, hehe...
    1. focusorganic
      Since I have an obsession with zombies..

      Billy Idol Eaten by Dead Next Door, Rebel Yell Heard for Miles
  46. TheBigRuski
    Jimmy Buffet Chokes on Cheeseburger in Paradise
    1. RTBjr73
      you sure it wasn't the french fried potato that did him in?
  47. GrayFoxDown
    Police Raid A Police Concert
    1. TheBigRuski
      arrrrgh!
  48. GrayFoxDown
    Well, I had a long, hot and steamy day here in New York City...that's my excuse.
    1. TheBigRuski
      Yep...me, too...only in the OC!
  49. kdawg68
    Sting tells crowd "don't stand so close to me" while activating self detonation device.
    1. TheBigRuski
      I luh-ove that one!
  50. jan4insight
    All right, I'll give it a whirl:

    Jimmy Buffet steps on a pop top; dies of acute blood poisoning.

    :-P
  51. PetLvr
    I get spam like this all the time! Here are the ones JUST FROM TODAY ...

    Norton Firm admits to releasing viruses
    Martha Stewart found unconscious in home
    3 US Marines killed in freak training accident
    Afghan bombing kills President Bush
    US launches airstrike against Afghanistan
    Britney spears says no to Madonna's film invitation
    Al Pacino investigated by police for mob funding
    Angelina Jolie dies in miscarriage
    Steve Jobs guilty of backdating stock options
    1. TheBigRuski
      Yes..most of us do!
  52. mattiasx
    Green Day flattened in a vehicle driven by an American Idiot
    1. TheBigRuski
      Good one...let me tighten up...

      Car Driven by American Idiot Flattens Green Day
  53. speedingzebra
    Snoop Dogg mauled to death by a Labrador ;-)
  54. bikram
    Lol i just clicked coz i think it is true
  55. TheBigRuski
    Some of these I've posted are from my co-workers. Like this one:

    Neil Diamond found in blue jeans lying in rocks on the side of a Brooklyn road in America
  56. kxthy73
    Britney Spears Was Sold As A Slave And Then Hit One More Time
  57. kxthy73
    Michael Jackson Goes To Jail For Being Bad......oh wait a minute....that headline could be true huh? hehe
  58. barryfromtexas
    BB King was ran over by a Cadillac driven by a jealous ex girlfriend who was under the influence of cheap wine just as police were about to arrest him for gambling. - Note: he had four aces in his hand.
  59. barryfromtexas
    Monkeys all die after the last train to Clarkesville derails
    1. TheBigRuski
      Most excellent!
  60. barryfromtexas
    John Denver crashes plane while experiencing a "rocky Mountain High"... oops that one IS true
    1. TheBigRuski
      Buddy Holly dies in plane crash. (Oh wait, that really happened.)
  61. mattiasx
    Busta Rhymes killed from drinking tainted Ice T.
  62. ThriftShopRomantic
    Billy Joel Goes to Extremes but Says He Didn't Start The Fire
  63. alexmcone
    Alex Mcone - you look horrible ! (actual spam mail heading)

    Now that is just rude.
    1. mattiasx
      They're just jealous...
  64. TheBigRuski
    Bon Jovi No Longer Lives On a Prayer
  65. RTBjr73
    Metallica drowns in Fuel
  66. RTBjr73
    Ozzt Osbourne ran over by a Crazy Train
  67. RTBjr73
    Saliva killed by a bomb that went "Click Click Boom"
  68. RTBjr73
    Steppenwolf died when they fell off their Magic Carpet Ride and landed on the Who's Magic Bus.
  69. ThriftShopRomantic
    Peter Gabriel Hit by Sledgehammer. Cause of Mysterious Red Rain.

    Digging in the Dirt to Come.
  70. RTBjr73
    Cinderella dies the other noght. No one heard them scream "Somebody Save Me"

    The rock group Bush died because Gwen Stefani served them glasses of "Glycerine"

    Disturbed died yesterday when they came "Down With The Sickness"

    Drowning Pool fell off a building and died when their "Bodies" hit the floor
    1. TheBigRuski
      not my era!
  71. RTBjr73
    Foreigner froze to death when they became "Cold As Ice".
    It happened on a "Blue Morning, Blue Day".
    They were taken to "Urgent" care, complaining of "Double Vision."
    Doctors asked if this happened before.
    They responded "Feels Like The First Time".
    1. TheBigRuski
      You're in marketing, right RTBjr73? Hmmmm....
    2. RTBjr73
      No sir, just too much useless information in the old melon of mine!
    3. TheBigRuski
      You need to be a professional spam headline writer!
    4. RTBjr73
      HA HA!! Yo Big, I'm for hire at the right price!
  72. lordlikely
    David Bowie Abducted by Life on Mars.
  73. wandadog13
    abba send out SOS
    Weather girls hit as men rained down on them
    Spice girls got what everyone really really wanted
    Flock of Seagulls tempted by decoy and shot
    1. ThriftShopRomantic
      Jonathan, the Spice Girls line-- inspired!
  74. Carola
    Ciao io Adoro Elton Jhon ho appena visto il suo concerto a venezia!!!!
    Is beautiful
  75. mattiasx
    The Police mysteriously fall dead after reading enchanted Message in a Bottle
  76. TheBigRuski
    Fans Driven To Tears by the Police Demise

    Officials Investigate Every Breath Taken in Police Murder
  77. TheBigRuski
    Sting Says 'Be Still My Beating Heart' Before Failure

    Sting's Death Ruled Murder by Numbers
  78. newward
    I got this one today - Girl attacked by pirahnas in Georgia

    edit: sorry
    1. TheBigRuski
      Bizarre...but start a new thread on that one! This is rock/music star specific!
    2. TheBigRuski
      no need to apologize at all! this is all about fun!
  79. GrayFoxDown
    Martha Reeves & The Vandellas Die In Heat Wave
    1. TheBigRuski
      Most excellent!
  80. lulubelleb
    Dylan Missing. Bloody Tracks Only Clue.

    Neil Young Impaled by Knight in Armor.
  81. webcartoonist
    This is a complete waste of time.
    1. TheBigRuski
      ^ doesn't get it!
  82. Dukepro25
    Gene Simmons shot by Love Guy
    1. Dukepro25
      *Love Gun
  83. mattiasx
    Coldplay found dead In My Place. Now I'm the prime suspect. WTF?!
  84. Dukepro25
    Steve Perry killed by Wheel In The Sky
  85. Dukepro25
    James Taylor flattened by Steamroller
    1. TheBigRuski
      already done!
  86. Dukepro25
    Rod Stewart found decapitated by the Downtown Train.
  87. Dukepro25
    Sting assassinated by the Russians
    1. TheBigRuski
      good one!
  88. Dukepro25
    Seal murdered by Killer
  89. Dukepro25
    Rob Thomas experiences heart failure after saying, "This Is How A Heart Breaks".
  90. Dukepro25
    Michael Buble dies in fiery car crash after rushing Home from a performance.
  91. roastfrog
    "The Police Murdered By Numbers"
    1. TheBigRuski
      already submitted!
  92. shagnast2100
    Gordon Lightfoot dies after the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald
  93. VampireFaust
    HAHAHAHAHAHA!
  94. kdawg68
    Warren Zevon shot by Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner

    Warren Zevon eaten alive by werewolves of London.

    Warren Zevon held captive by extremists - begs fans to send lawyers, guns, and money.
    1. TheBigRuski
      That last one is AWESOME!
  95. Dukepro25
    George Michael's Faith was tried after falling off a 10 story building and dying on impact.
  96. Dukepro25
    Phil Collins dies of overdose after One More Night of hardcore drugs.
  97. Dukepro25
    Peter Gabriel shot by sniper atop Solsbury Hill.
  98. focusorganic
    I just got one of those emails, but mine wasn't very funny. If I'm going to get spam, couldn't it least be funny?
  99. lulubelleb
    Jett Assaulted: Crazed Blackhearts Fan Wants to Touch Joan "There".
  100. TheBigRuski
    Chrissie Hynde Run Over in the Middle of the Road

    Pretenders' Member Attempts Escape Back on the Chain Gang

    Hynde Called 'Precious' at Memorial
  101. seaglassorganic
    here goes....Janet Jackson clawed to death by Black Cat
  102. mattiasx
    Making Love in an Elevator proves fatal for Aerosmith.
    1. Dukepro25
      lol

      Good one
  103. MagicWandBook
    Bryan Adams goes to Heaven and passes Alice Cooper on his way down to Hell.
  104. TheBigRuski
    Three more from my co-worker:

    Ringo bludgeoned by Maxwell's silver hammer
    The missing Steve Miller found living in the USA
    Johnny Cash falls into a ring of fire
  105. TheBigRuski
    Police Lose Rickie's Number in Steely Dan Case
  106. TheBigRuski
    NOTE: Those of you who have already participated, please re-submit your best one below with your blog name and url. I will be making a best list post asap on one of my blogs! Those that haven't posted one above, can still enter your best.

    Thanks!
  107. MagicWandBook
    Hello TheBigRuski

    Ok here is my headline...

    Bryan Adams goes to Heaven and passes Alice Cooper on his way down to Hell.

    What Would You Do With a Magic Wand For a Day?
    whatwouldyoudowithamagicwandforaday.blogspot.com/

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