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Have You Failed As A Father If Your Daughter Ends Up On The Pole?

Posted by stayfitbug • 9/27/09 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: entertainment, family, health, life, women

In some countries pole dancing is praised and perceived as a great type of fitness activity.

While in some others... not quite so.

But if your daughter ends of up on the pole, have you failed as a father or Mother?

User Comments

9/27/09

MissSuzie

Oh god.

[reply]
1. 9/27/09
  
  stayfitbug
  
  What Suzie?
2. 9/27/09
  
  MissSuzie
  
  What what?
3. 9/27/09
  
  stayfitbug
  
  What Wh-What? ...
9/27/09

dbowles1017

Oh lord.

[reply]
1. 9/27/09
  
  Agit8r
  
  yesss! harder!
  
  I got suzy with it last time, so I had to spread the misery around
2. 9/27/09
  
  dbowles1017
  
  Oh great JEDIDIAH!
9/27/09

MadameX

I suppose the answer to that depends on the answers to a couple of hundred other questions: What values did you try to instill in her? Did you want her to blindly accept your values or make her own decisions? Is she doing that work because she's addicted to crack and it's a good place to get her habit fed, or because she finds it an easy way to pay her graduate school tuition, or just because she enjoys dancing and the money is good?

[reply]
1. 9/27/09
  
  stayfitbug
  
  It can be good or bad..a mix of all of those. But would be proud to tell everyone that your daughter pole dances?
2. 9/27/09
  
  MadameX
  
  I think the obsession with being "proud" of things that are simply facts of life is a bit misplaced and leads to a lot of trouble in our society. I'm not "proud" to tell people that my oldest daughter works in a restaurant or my son plays the clarinet that my younger daughter prefers fantasy novels to mainstream fiction. Those are just details of their lives. The things that make me proud of my kids have a lot more to do with how they treat other human beings than their "achievements" or lack thereof.
3. 9/27/09
  
  Agit8r
  
  excellent point MX
4. 9/27/09
  
  stayfitbug
  
  Very good point... but unfortunately, many in society seem to care a great deal of what others think... for what ever reason.
5. 9/27/09
  
  MadameX
  
  So I guess I would say that you have failed as a parent if you have raised a child who is more concerned about what others think than what his/her own honest judgment and the advice of those he/she has reason to trust and respect say.
6. 9/27/09
  
  Agit8r
9/27/09

stayfitbug

Well?

[reply]
9/27/09

crazyTsu

I congratulate Bug on having started this thread - and congratulate everyone who participated. It's really a tough question... especially for the people who don't find it culturally acceptable
And from the point of view of the people not "that much into" pole dancing, yes, it would seem something went wrong somewhere

[reply]
9/27/09

nothingprofound

No one has failed. No one is a failure in life.

[reply]
1. 9/27/09
  
  crazyTsu
  
  From the big picture perspective, there is no success, no failure, no good, no evil, etc
9/27/09

bettieblogger

I don't think a parent has failed at thier job if thier child decides to pole dance for a living. I've been to many a strip club as I've known both men & women who have done this for a living.. The issue isn't so much that they choose to dance, it's the environment in which they work that's the issue.

Personally, I think if you can stay clean and do this job, then there is no shame in it. Let's also remember that not all pole dancers are "strippers". There are many forms of exotic dance that can be enjoyed.

Your question is an interesting one though, as it brings up so many other questions ... Many of us have watched a dancer and enjoyed the show without any concern for their lives once they are off the stage.. Yet, if your daughter or son was the next dancer up, you'd probably fall off your chair then rush to boot them off the stage..

I think the main point here is IF your child ends up choosing this as a way to make money, it really isn't about you as the parent. They would have to be of legal age to get hired in the first place and as we all know, as adults, we're responsible for our own actions..

I don't think blame/shame or any other negative response should really come into play here.

[reply]
9/27/09

brooklynposh

on the pole? as stripping pole? I don't think so.. people have minds of their own and sometimes no matter what you do you lack control of them..

[reply]
1. 9/27/09
  
  stayfitbug
  
  On the pole... not necessarily stripping. The point is that being on the pole is perceived in a negative way by the masses in most parts of the world in terms of making a living.
9/27/09

NatetheGrate

Not that I know of.

[reply]
9/27/09

Theresa111

Hard question.

[reply]
1. 9/28/09
  
  stayfitbug
  
  Attempt the answer Theresa
9/27/09

crazyTsu

Why only father, even a mother could feel responsible?

[reply]
9/28/09

celticmusicfan

Are you talking about the younger sister of Miley Cyrus who ended up taking pics on the pole?

[reply]
1. 9/28/09
  
  stayfitbug
  
  Anyone
2. 9/28/09
  
  RoflopagosIsland
  
  lol that was a disturbing performance
9/28/09

RoflopagosIsland

I'm sure most would feel as if they failed. Sometimes children of even the best of parents choose this type of path. Which countries praise it, I'm curious?

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