Discussions

How Not to Annoy Airport Security

Posted by ThriftShopRomantic • 11/05/08 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: air travel, airplanes, airport security, flying, humor, metal detectors

Since the holiday travel season is just about upon us here in the U.S., I thought it would be helpful to pull together sime helpful tips for the average traveler...

Y'know, to get smoothly through security without the violation of any body cavities:

cabbages-n-kings.blogspot.com/2008/11/how-to-not-annoy-airport-security.htm...

Er, okay, yes, yes, it is satire. But still... I figured you all might get a laugh.

Any airport security stories YOU care to share? I'd enjoy hearing them,

User Comments

11/05/08

IbneAdam

I liked the post.

I, personally, avoid it by travelling in trains.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Well, sure, if you want it to be all pleasant, comfortable and EASY.
11/05/08

SailboaterRob

I read your article. I think you should add some additional information so it will be more thorough and complete for your readers.

For example, you forgot to mention body jewelry. Read this -

Airport security force woman to remove nipple ring with pliers
www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,21985,23445578-663,00.html

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  I did mean that to be covered in the general jewelry section, but perhaps it merits a specific shout-out.
11/05/08

myriadlife

I got told off for taking a stone out of Cyprus.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  As in you're an international jewel thief, or you took a pretty rock from a park?
11/05/08

myriadlife

Ah no, I took a rock from the beach. I was young and careless and the guard teased me about it. International Jewel thief sounds far too glamorous for me!

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  At least it sounds like the guard had a sense of humor about it.
11/05/08

PrincessQuello

Aahaha, loved it.

I traveled to Turkey this past summer and my brother's brand new cologne was tossed because the idiot didn't put it in his luggage but took it with him on his carry-on.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Ugh- what a waste. And it's that stuff that you don't think about that always gets you in trouble.
11/05/08

CharlieHash

comment removed by the community.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Hey, um, Charlie. Linkdropping like that is kinda considered... not cool... here on BlogCatalog. It's against the terms and conditions.
  
  If, however, you'd like to tell us about your airport travel experiences, that would be fun.
11/05/08

calais50

I guess I have the terrorist look, b/c the last time I traveled, I got singled out for a "pat down." No big deal.
Another thing...When I came back from Ireland was during the time when mad cow disease was running rampant. Everyone who had visited a farm in Ireland (like me) had to step onto a big sponge with disinfectant on it when we landed in the states. I thought that was interesting. Also, while we were in Ireland, a lot of stores had similar sponges as you walked into the store.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Stepping on a sponge? What exactly was that supposed to do?
  
  Heh, you are probably the least likely to have the shifty appearance of a terrorist-- thus making you THE PERFECT DECOY!
2. 11/05/08
  
  calais50
  
  I think the disinfectant on the sponge was supposed to kill mad cow disease you might have tracked on your feet. It worked, because I'm proud to say I'm mad cow disease free
3. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Good to know.
11/05/08

myriadlife

One of my poor cousins apparently looked just like a drug smuggler they were looking for and he got the full cavity search. Yikes.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Wow... bummer!
11/05/08

Manictastic

Get a private jet, that works:D

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  I could afford, oh, a model airplane kit...
  
  That's not the same thing, is it?
11/05/08

ekim941

That's not a satire, it's dead on.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Funny how satire and painful reality overlap. Thanks for reading!
11/05/08

faithsju243

Funny post, I left a comment on your page....we have to believe the torture they put us through if for our own safety.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  The beeping because of bra underwire you'd mentioned happened to me once, too-- I totally forgot about that.
  
  It's pretty bad when you have to elaborately plan undergarments, too.
11/05/08

MidwestMom

The funniest thing I've seen are business people with slippers on (to make shoe removal easier). I took the hint and let my kids wear their slippers the last time we flew.

The worst was when a stylish woman had lace-up boots that went over her calves. They had to sideline the poor girl so she could take them off. It's the price of fashion, I suppose!

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  And there was probably no room for that girl to do her elaborate boot removal, either. Yikes.
2. 11/05/08
  
  MidwestMom
  
  It probably would have been more comfortable for her (in her folding chair) if she had not so unfortunately chosen to wear a skirt short enough so that everyone could see her... boots.
  
  On the bright side, men in line stopped complaining about the wait.
3. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Maybe the airport should have hired her to improve (at least male) customer morale in the long lines.
11/05/08

PetLvr

Well .. I had to stumble just because of your disclaimer...

Disclaimer: The information on this page is in no way accurate or represents anything even remotely related to current airport security guidelines.

[reply]
1. 11/05/08
  
  ThriftShopRomantic
  
  Heh- thanks, Hart. I didn't want angry airport security men emailing saying I was a U.S. security hazard or somethin'.