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How real is too real?

Posted by ArsenicCookies • 7/03/09 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: nettiquette, tmi

In my most recent post I have went recounted the events of yesterday's miscarriage and have discovered some people have been offended, disgusted and some even angry about how descriptive I was.

(this is not shameless promotion, it is simply simplifying the finding the post method to see if it is indeed tmi)
www.secretlivesofmilfs.com/casey/?p=1517

I would like to know what is considered TMI?

Should some things remain private?

If a blogger uses their blog to vent, should they hold off or censor themselves if they have inadvertantly gained a following?

User Comments

7/03/09

timethief

Yours is a personal blog that contains posts about personal matters. I haven't read the post. I'm about to eat & I'm starving. I say: Ignore the flack and blog on.

[reply]
1. 7/03/09
  
  ArsenicCookies
  
  that is what I was thinking. The reactions just took me by surprise since as you said, it is a personal blog.
7/03/09

Anok

Read and commented. No one - NO ONE should be offended by what you wrote! If they cannot handle details (which were not very detailed - it's not like you went all gory) they should not have read it, plain and simple.

I'm terribly sorry for your loss, tell those who are/were offended that perhaps right now is the time for support - not judgment.

[reply]
1. 7/03/09
  
  ArsenicCookies
  
  thank you. I could not understand the reactions but hav about 10 comments in moderation mode that are just... well terrible. So that would be an acceptable level of detail then in your opinion?
2. 7/03/09
  
  Anok
  
  After having been through it myself (and thus, a bit more sensitive about it) yes, the level was acceptable to me. I didn't find it the least bit offensive. The post certainly had an effect - but not one of anger or disgust.
  
  A post like that should stir empathy - not attacks.
3. 7/03/09
  
  timethief
  
  I read the post and I agree with Anok. I'm so sorry about your loss. This was a terrible and traumatic event and you need support not criticism. We are all adults and those who choose to read your blog are reading a personal blog. Their sensibilities are not at issue here.
  
  Leave the comments in moderation for at least another day and seek out those who love you. Let them surround you with love, and let go of any notion that you did anything wrong.
4. 7/03/09
  
  ArsenicCookies
  
  Thanks guys
5. 7/03/09
  
  Anok
  
  ♥
6. 7/03/09
  
  timethief
  
  &hearts {HUG}
7/03/09

wagerwitch

I didn't find the post bad. I found it to be human and perfect and an EXCELLENT piece of your life.

You are a TRUE to life person who posts what they say - what they feel - what they hear and what happens to them.

It wasn't overly graphic - and ANYONE who says those kinds of things to you - those awful things - those people have NEVER been in your shoes.

Those that have - or have been through something with someone else - who have actually lived life - they will someday have to deal with such a trauma.

And I send you my warmest wishes. I commented - I had a miscarriage at 5 months... I know what it is like - to lose something that you thought would be a full human. I don't know why these things happen... I don't know if there ever IS a reason. They just do.

Time DOES heal. You will always remember it - but time does heal - trust in that.

Ditch the jerk - as Anok Said.

Find someone you can love and loves you for you.

And please - NEVER listen to those who critiscize you for being honest and being yourself.

They have their own problems to deal with... And if they didn't want to read your blog - they didn't have to.

And on a second note - I'll bet EVERY ONE OF THEM is anonymous - and probably like a troll from here on BC - I'll lay odds that they are all the same person... who has some ISSUES.

So don't listen to them - ok?

They aren't talking from a motherly or adult perspective - they are talking from some warped perspective that NEEDS to hurt other people and tries to find a weakness and exploits it - because it makes them feel better about themselves.

So don't let it get to you.

Hugs! MASSIVE HUGS!!!

WW

[reply]
7/03/09

nburmandesign

whew... I would say 'kudos to you' for being so honest. I'm sure there are lots of people who would breath and cry a sigh of relief at knowing there is someone else going through what they are.

Don't mind me, though. I'm pathetically squeamish, so I'm not one to go by!

Still - your honesty should be applauded. As for the others, well, there is an off button.

[reply]
7/03/09

ArsenicCookies

I want to thank everyone here for their well wishes. I do hope that things improve. For now though I am just so incredibly tired so please do forgive my not answering or responding individually as I typically do. Everyone here has been so kind that I think I will go to bed on a good note before that changes. Good Night all and thanks again, truly you all have no idea how the littlest gestures of kindness can make or break somebody's day.. and you all have greatly improved what started out and seemed destined to remain a terrible day. For that I thank you again.

[reply]
1. 7/03/09
  
  timethief
  
  G'night and sleep well.
7/04/09

chicky401

I read your post and also commented. I do not see anything at all wrong with what you posted. I also want to say that I am so sorry to hear this Hang in there and take care of yourself. Many hugs go out to you! ((((HUGS))))
PS. Don't let the jerks bother you, I can't believe they would even consider reacting like they did

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