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How To Gradually End a Relationship and Start a New One?
Posted by ModelElaine • 1/30/09 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: Dating, relationships
Say the current relationship does not make you excited anymore and it kinda wore off. You meet someone you like who likes you and they ask you out. What is the best way to roll from one relationship into another smoothly without drama and at the same time not do what would be considered cheating on anyone? Your thoughts please. Be nice!
User Comments
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Well there is ways to smoothly end the one you are in, but as soon as he sees you out with another guy he would be pretty angry esp if it is when you just broke up.
I would just tell him straight up "hey its not workin for me nemore, I want to try some new things" -
I think there isn't a smooth way to finish a relationship. Its got to be done and got to deal with the outcome, and move on.
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If that's the way you're feeling, and your eye is already on someone else, it's dishonest to stay in the previous relationship and mislead the person just so you can avoid drama. Try telling the truth directly--it might be ugly for a moment, but it's better than an extended deception and giving someone an actual reason to feel wronged. -
I just stop answering some calls and try my best to stay away from them for a week or more, then that will turn into a month and then he'll call saying "whats up?" then I'll say "Its me not you...Im breaking up". Then Im scotts free to go with the other boy.
A few weeks ago, my ex-boyfriend was being a douche bag to me at his shindig and realizing that I knew the bartender, I left the party early with him...he swept me off my feet and onto his bed...oh and in my heart blah blah blah. So, thats another way to break up and start a new relationship.-
How would you like to be the person whose calls were ignored and was sitting on the other end of that trying to figure out what was going on? What's so hard about telling the truth?
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hmmm...good point...sooo...yeah, that never happened to me and I dont think it ever will. I've been pretty good at feeling out a relationship, if it starts to die down and die out then I usually move on quickly. I do tell the truth...eventually. But to answer your question I guess I would feel sad, but then I'd move on...thats life.
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Yep...and life is much easier when people treat each other with respect.
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yeah....I'll be sure think about it....
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It would be hard on both parties but its better be to discussed in a civil manner..if u think its not possible cause it would erupt into a fight, writing a letter first explaining the reasons and how u see the future of the relationship would be a better alternative, then the "talk-over". That way both parties would be ready for the inevitable "close-encounter", rather than telling it upfront which may cause bitterness on the aggrieved party and may turn into a very unpleasant situation. I would advice that the current relationship be difinitely ended first before getting involved with someone else. That way there wouldnt be guilty feelings on your part and the ex wont feel he's been cheated.
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I am a very straight forward kinda person. Everybody knows where they stand with me. If a relationship goes down hill you need to tell them. I am not one for telling you what to say as I am typically too blunt, I need to learn to sugar coat my words just a little. -
I think it's best to be honest and just say "I think you should go to your local sexual health clinic cos we are through"-
I gotta use that next time
Can I please?? -
oh noes LOL
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People like an honest approach I think.
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Transvestite hooker. -
"This relationship does not make me excited anymore and it kinda wore off. I met someone I like who likes me and they asked me out. So, I'm just going to roll from this relationship into another smoothly without drama and at the same time not do what would be considered cheating on anyone."
Yep, I think you answered your own question -
hidden answer smartly dug out by you ekim941.
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cut down the frequency of seeing in person.
cut down talking over phone.
prepare the other person to manage your separation.
then finally tell the truth.-
that sounds a little like what I said except nicer. I think your steps also lowers the rate of the other person becoming a psycho stalker.
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Start with the infamous line: "Listen, we need to talk". That gets half the job done. -
There is no smooth way. I don't think it should be done gradually. If you don't have feelings for your partner any more, then break up.
You can't have your cake and eat it too.-
but the question is about gradually.
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@sensico
I 'm not that learned as you are in that subject. So I 'm just god enough to be your student. will you teach me ? -
I HATE being strung along. If you want to end it, just say so. makes life a whole hell of a lot easier for everyone involved. -
I would be upfront and honest to the dumpee. With my new relationship I would keep it on the downlow, perferably staying away from places you might run into your ex or mutual friends for a bit. As a girl I wouldn't want my ex to show up at the bar the next night with a new girl and have me wondering how long he was carrying on for without me knowing. -
I have struggled with this in the past; not with anyone I was in a long term relationship with, but maybe someone I had been going out with for 1-3 months. I am a very honest person, but at the same time, I find it very hard to tell someone I don't want to see them anymore. I once told a guy I wanted to end things-in an e-mail. I feel bad about it now, but I knew if I didn't tell him in an e-mail that it would take me at least a month to get the nerve to tell him in person. Definitely being completely honest immediately is the best way to handle it.
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