Discussions
I hate having to deal with my sexuality (Am I crazy)
Posted by AronSora • 7/16/09 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: frustrated, sex
Just some general information about me
-Male
-Straight
-18 years old
-I'm not very Religious
-I am a workaholic
-I am a virgin
It seems that every cell in my body is telling me to have sex, but my mind is telling me otherwise. I can't think of any logical reason to have sex, expect kids (but I support the childfree movement), yet I long for it. I've only seen sex bring misery and suffering (except in two couples), yet I want it. This contradiction is starting to kill me. I find myself fantasizing a lot.
It's not that sex is getting in my way, in fact my parents tell me I have to relax more before I burn myself out. I basically got all "A"s in high school and I'm going to an Ivy League college. But, if I didn't have to deal with my sexuality, I would have more time to work. My life plan has no room for sex, yet I long for touch. I could do so much more if I could some how cut sexuality out of my life.
I don't know how to make sense of it. I don't get why I'm so confused and frustrated. Others seem to comprehend this, I don't. Others seem comfortable with sex and do it without a second thought, I've been tortured thinking about this. I hate having this animal side. I hate this illogical process in my mind that seeks sex. Why can't I be a computer? All I want to do is achieve my dreams and sex does fit into them. Can you help me? Am I crazy?
User Comments
-
No you're not.
But I guess you will be if you wait much longer...
-
Yes, you are KRAZY!!!
"I've only seen sex bring misery and suffering" not drugs, not war, not hunger but SEX?? what our bodies naturally need and hunger for? it's like saying food and water bring only suffering. I mean I have nothing against you being a virgin because I waited too and I believe that sex is sacred because our bodies are and we should share both with only someone we love or at least care for. But when you find that person, instead of wishing you could be a computer, do them like one just don't forget to put on a firewall
-
I just hear so many horror stories about sex. How many friendships were ruined because of sex. I don't want that to happen. -
My friendships all start with sex. except for my guy friends. -
then do people who aren't your friends, like your friends moms
-
-
Don't go by what others do. Most people in this world do the wrong thing. The best fun is just going on dates in your 20s. When you get older you will know spending time with someone you like is more fun than sex is. A lot of people smoke pot and take drugs. You want to follow them also?-
"When you get older you will know spending time with someone you like is more fun than sex is"
Well, I'm sure he will but when he'll be MUCH older than now... -
If you're gonna do it, do it right. Have sex and then smoke pot afterwards. Maybe then you'll relax for a minute or two and stop worrying about some robotic life plan.
What's that saying? "The best laid plans of mice and men often go astray..." Just relax enjoy being young and don't worry about plans.
-
-
Please remember that you are in fact Human and not a Vulcan.
"I hate this illogical process in my mind"
At 18 I thought I knew everything, at 27 I now realise that I knew nothing then about life and only know a bit more now.
and No you are not crazy.-
oh man, let me damage him in peace!!!
-
I think you are more than he could handle
-
Thank you, I guess I just want to be in full control of my emotions. Don't worry, LolitaV's blog "damaged" me enough, but it was fun.
-
lol Aron,that's what I'm talking about.
My blog is actually created by aliens in space who use my robotic, engineered likability to lure virgin teens in and destroy them. Our plan is to use their virgin scents to fuel our weapons and take over your planet, our future home. Through sex, Galaxy domination will be ours, WAHAHAHAHHA,WHAHAHAHAHAH, WAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHHHHHHHH*Malfunction*HHHHHHHHHHHHAAA*MalfuncRebootHTML>??://!WS.
-
-
You are not crazy. You are human. Honestly, your life isn't going to suffer from having a girlfriend and having sex. Just have safe sex. Condoms, birth control.
Then again, if you don't feel ready, you're not ready. Just don't think that your life is going to go straight to hell and spiral out of control if you have a relationship. More than likely, your life will be enriched. You have to remember, there are plenty of couples who are happy, satisfied and feel that their partners make them stronger people. I've got to tell you, most of my friends are highly successful people who have master's degrees, high paying careers, but also have marriage and children.
It's all about balance. You shouldn't be afraid of experiencing different things and branching out while you're young. It's a long life.
One more thing, at the end of your life, what do you want to look back on. Money? Career? Or do you want to look back at a life filled with people and love. You're only 18 and have a lot of growing up to do, but I can tell you this. Sooner or later you'll realize that money and career are empty, material values. It's the people in your life that matter.-
Nicely put still.
-
He's young. Plenty of time to figure it out.
-
Yes your answer really helped me out too. I have been suffering with the same questions. -
"Sooner or later you'll realize that money and career are empty, material values. It's the people in your life that matter."
Well, he's 18, I'm sure he'll realize it one day but we'll be all dead by that time.
Today, and for quite a few years to come, what he thinks and will be thinking is about sex mainly... -
And that is of any use to this how? I think we are all quite clear on how old he is and what is on his mind.
-
Anin,
Lavender aardvarks are too busy fending off molesting hands to get a firm grip on their sexuality. -
Well I was hoping that was a big enough hint for you and Claire to offer to "Help me out" I was dreaming of being the filling in a Korean/welsh love sandwich.
-
Hmm, you're still very young Crpitt.
I'm afraid you still have a lot to learn also. -
Why be afraid? I have already stated that.
-
Korean/Welsh sandwich with large serving of purple mayonnaise.
-
@still you are disgusting, I am ashamed of you! I expect it off the donkeh.
heh -
Ok I'll go for the sandwich, without the mayonnaise
-
Hey, Anin was the one who brought it up! I just added the purple mayonnaise!
-
Too late, you lowered the tone.
-
Purple Mayonnaise
-
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
-
I'm afraid you would have to make do with "Uncle Anin's patented old fashioned lavender mayonnaise"
-
*vomits*
-
Hey! It's Aardvarkilicious! People say the sweetly anise taste and the way it flakes in the mouth lift it far above your average everyday condiments
-
*passes out*
-
...
Purple... mayonnaise...
Love sandwich...
Why not just add some baking soda
-
-
Stop being a pussy and do it. You are overthinking it.
-
hey, don't insult pussy!!!!
-
Lol! But he is acting like one (not the actual thing).
-
how does pussy act, not like him imo. he's acting more like balls. doing nothing but hit the "wall".
-
I dont know the origins of the insult. I guess he cant be a pussy because he isnt getting f***ed
-
THANK YOU! so he's balls
-
That's my problem. I feel like I have to apply logic to everything in my life and this doesn't fit any logical model I came up with.
-
I think he is a cow on AstroTurf.... -
Stop acting like balls and just hanging around. Act like a pussy and go get some. Dont think just do. Do anything that moves. Get it over with.
-
@aron life usually doesnt fit into a logical model. sex and relationships usually dont make much sense, but thats part of the fun. RELAX!
-
-
First of all your ovethinking this whole sex thing...Onviously you have a lot of plans, but sex and life plans dont necesarily have to be mutually exclusive. Go to college and do your thing, and eventually youll meet a cool girl who you feel comfortable with and youll have sex. There doesnt have to be a timeline for sex and remember be safe! I lost my virginity at 19, and it hapenned and from then on I began a fun sexlife and in no way did it interfere with studies, I got good grades throughout my college experience.
-
He is not overthinking it, he is just thinking only about it.
But you're right, there is no timeline for sex, and no need to worry about it.
Just follow runningshoes advice before it comes to you
-
-
no you are not crazy...you are just plain horny!!
Ever heard of masturbation?-
the hand can only get you so far, amigo!
-
might quench his thirst though....at least for the time being...
-
once you wear yourself out with it, forget about being horny. You might actually even aquire an attention span.
I recommend lotion. They don't call it Jergens for nothing
-
Oh man....I'm starting to feel guilty about corrupting the poor guys head....We must be leaving him more confused than ever!
-
No, don't worry. Reading report on sex in space and problem that must be fixed before people can have sex in space is more corrupting.
-
-
Don't do it! It's a trap!
-
On Sex:
Kid, let me tell ya...sex is very much like jumping off a pier. The run towards the edge is usually a lot more exciting than the jump itself. Then the jump is severely more thrilling than the submersion into water. If you wanted to have sex today you could. But you have too many ideas about what sex should be fogging up your head.-
Very nicely put.
-
Thanks...
-
That made things a bit clearer, thanks
-
-
Look, the thing is this, it is already difficult as a young adult to deal with his own sexuality. I've been there, it can be hell if you don't have the right avenue to lose out your frustrations, sometimes it is very unbalancing, unbecoming especially when it comes to dealing with girls normally.
I've went down that road taking the easy way out (don't ask), and though it gave me a sense of control over myself and when it comes to dealing with girls, the experience also tends to make one very detached from them from time to time, because I've learnt in a weird way not everything about girls is sex.
But that is from me, I can't say the same about you. The bottomline is, that there are ways to deal with your own sexual urges, make sure that you don't hurt yourself first or anybody else, because your conscience may or may not live with the guilt.-
That one of the main sticking points I have with sex. I hate being sexually attracted to some of my female friends. We are friends, there shouldn't be anything sexual between us. At least in the ideal friendship.
-
So your gay. Go out and find another dude and do him. I have f***ed every one of my female friends. And still do (some). Or get uglier friends.
-
Really? They were comfortable with it? I just don't want to risk any of my friendships. That and my female friends are way out of my league.
-
Of course they ok with it. And there is no such thing as leagues. The moment you think you dont have a chance you dont.
-
Thinking back, one of my female friends was constantly telling me to be more confident. Now it makes sense.
-
Remember, when you ever choose to be sexually involved with any girl or woman, you need to bear in mind that often, her feelings would involve you in her very personal life.
And feelings to a woman is very important.
Oh, and you know something ? The way you've described about how you feel ? Chances that the girls would feel the same way as you do, is quite most likely. And they would feel all embarrassed when they like a guy and have sexual urges towards him.
-
-
Heres an old saying. The only ones who say sex isnt a big deal are the ones not having it (or having good sex).
-
Speaking of which...don't we have a date, sweet heart?
-
Wrong ! They are the ones who would theorize their sexual urges can be held back just like their bladders. And somehow manage to do it.
-
I need to pick up one of them tantric books first. Go get laid first then you can tell me im wrong.
-
I am not speaking for myself heh.
-
Azure I didnt look at your name and confused you for some one else. My B. =p
-
-
You need to work all this out for yourself. You're a unique individual and no one else's suggestions will be of much use to you. It might help to find a therapist you trust with whom you can discuss your particular feelings and concerns. A good therapist will encourage you to be yourself, not fifty other people. I had plenty of sexual reservations when I was younger, for slightly different reasons. It's a great and joyous adventure discovering your own path in life.-
Thanks, I'll see what help I can get in college.
-
-
Son, look before you leap. If you see a foaming seabiscuit, get the hell out of there!"
-
foaming seabiscuit...
I don't want to know... -
well you might need to know, you know for safety purposes
But seriously though sex is good for you. The mantras I live by are:
One orgasm a day Keep the Docs away
One orgasm a day Keeps divorce at bay
One orgasm a day, man!!! Live it
-
-
Make room in your life for both logic and passion. If you only have logic, then life is flavourless and colourless. If you only have the latter, you achieve nothing. Balance in all things.
-
I just feel safer at the this extreme. Nothing can go wrong here, while balancing something could go wrong.
-
Actually, you have the most to lose at the extreme. Life is about more than school and career. Are you afraid? It sounds like a big part of your dilemma is being afraid of getting involved with someone period.
I have been trying to become braver in my life. No risk, no reward. I think the same lesson applies to you as well.
-
-
Just follow your own bent. Everything'll turn out fine.
-
Maybe you could cut off your penis?
::I'm being sarcastic here, so don't sue me later::-
why not and donate it too. if the right size, it will make the perfect mantle piece.
-
-
Man I feel for you Aron, however sex is crazy addictive. Once your little cherry is popped, there is no stopping. -
I'm still trying to imagine what it would be like if sex was more logical. Rather like helping your partner put together a flat pack bedroom set, I think.
Add Your Comment
Login to leave a message.
