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My date with god.
Posted by LolitaV • 10/10/09 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: god really is taking me out 2nite, yes
So, God asked me out and I cannot begin to explain how excited I am atm (he must have read my comment in the what would you ask god thread)
So, since I haven't been on a non-marrital date in the last 7 years, do you guys have any pointers, tips, etc... to share with me? How should I dress, what to say, order, go, etcc..
User Comments
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It's a shame you do not have a "date" with God everyday. It's the dates we tend to miss that might be the really important ones.
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so true. I will not be late or miss this one. I hope we do it and then we have a baby and then there will be churches built in his honor after the gets crucified. I am so excited!!!!! Oh god!
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Drop the zero and get with a hero.-
can you get a woman pregnant with just a thought?
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God won't do that. It's against his principles.
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If he/she comes in the shape of a swan you know you're really going to get f*****d.-
Her name is Lola, not Lida. -
After the swan gets finished with her, it'll be loleather.
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LOL!!!! i hope to get fcked by him, bien sur
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Slutty, but not overly so. Leave a little to the imagination. He can use his x-ray vision on you or send a strong wind to lift up the skirt, so don't put it all out there. Make him work a little.
Be a good listener and laugh at his jokes, if he makes any. I have to imagine God has a sense of humor or else he wouldn't have made George W. Bush president for 8 years straight.
Since he's God, money shouldn't be an issue. I would order what ever you want, just be a lady and don't gorge yourself on it.
Ask him to take you to Napa valley for dinner at French Laundry. He's god, he should have the ability to teleport you instantaneously. Then teleport to Paris for espresso, wine, cheese and chocolate.-
oh ST!!! u r always so thoughtful, i forgot about his TPing abilities. I cannot wait. I know it's be fun. I am just worried he won't find me attractive and will dump me for someone else.
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Well, if it works out, you should definitely f*ck him. Hopefully, he will inseminate you with his God sperm and then Jesus will return to the planet, issued forth from your loins.
Then all the stupid BS that we have to put up with will all come to an end. End of the world, let's get on with the thousand years of darkness. I plan on being wiped out in the initial apocalypse. -
God doesn't believe in pre-marital sex
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ouhhh, i might get an abortion then if it happens because I am not down with the end of the world and the apocalypse thing. I want to live and meet with god 2x a week in a motel near Mary's house.
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Pfft. God does believe in pre-marital sex. Jesus wasn't married and he was definitely getting it on with Mary Magdelene.
@Lola
What? You can't abort the second coming of the lord! For shame... -
I would date you, if you wouldn't make me work so much ..
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