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Pick ANOTHER God - Which One?
Posted by wagerwitch • 5/14/09 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: choose a religion, other gods, pick a god
OK - Here's a question to you all.
I'm curious, which is my only reason for posting this question.
IMAGINE THIS:
You are born NOW... This day and technology.
CHRIST HAS NOT BEEN BORN.
You have several choices here - GREEK GODS, ROMAN GODS, EGYPTIAN GODS...
You must pick a God.
Tell me which --- OF THOSE THREE CHOICES ABOVE ONLY --- which one would you pick to follow --- and WHY?
I'll check back in a couple of hours - to see the results...
But please - out of curiosity -- do take a moment and answer...
****AFTER ADD
YOU MUST PICK A SPECIFIC GOD or GODDESS out of GREEK or EGYPTIAN or ROMAN choices*****
Sorry for the extra add - but code and someone else asked a question - which I realized I had not answered in the request... So thank you.
END OF AFTER ADD*******
User Comments
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Shouldn't "none of the above" be an option?-
Nah - you don't have an OPTION - you have to pick a SPECIFIC GOD (I did fix my question up there --- you have those three religious types to choose from ----)
So go FORTH - and choose...
*grin*
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Greek. I don't know why
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Me too, but only because those in college seem to have one hell of a time.
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Greek - greek --- which one?
Of course - it's all greek to me... Dang Gyros... Love 'em. -
Whichever one parties the most.
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ROFLMAO - suzie - no doubt...
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Would that be Bacchaus?
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codesucker can't go to Bacchanalia though...men literally get ripped apart at those... -
Dionysus
Wow - yanno - ecstasy isn't so bad... LMAO -
Dionysus and Bacchus are the same...(Bacchus Roman equiv)
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OK code and MissSuzie - You guys chose Dionysus/Bachus.
WHAT IS YOUR PRIESTHOOD CALLING FOR AS THEIR FIRST RULE OF ORDER?
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(I wanted Norse gods...but fine...)
I pick Egyptian Gods....because they have the kinkiest myths! The world was created by a divine act of masturbation and that which...erm...spewed forth became the world...nice...so Amun, for creating in such a gross way!-
ROCK on Siul --- You taught me something I didn't know.
Strange - I've always like Cleo Baby. -
The original big bang theory. -
OOOh you have such a way with words - You know - everyone was looking for you earlier.
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I have seen that thread and I'm shocked anyone would think I would want to be associated with such filth. I have been in the shower for the last two hours trying to scrub myself clean.....never get....clean....
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Now - Siul - when you wake up....
I want to find out what your first Rule for Humanity would be. -
If it has to be related to Amun...hmm...masturbation instead of prayer! haha!
But if I can have an unrelated rule I'd like to borrow from the teachings of Bill and Ted and say "Be excellent to each other"... -
Amun is bored and starts touching himself in ways that makes him feel good - and as he arches his back, he spews forth the world and universe.
As he watches in sleepy amazement, he decides that this is interesting and notices a few people below.
When he wakes up from his nap, he decides to make Siul into a HIGH PRIESTESS and she watches Amun as he plays pocket pool.
She decides that all of the followers must play with themselves, in private or in public as they pray.
People do this and it becomes a natural occurrence for men to pray every 20 minutes on a regular basis, however, by noon, they all become like ZOMBIES and the term SIESTA is born.
As they continue to Masturbate, the followers of Amun stop having as much intercourse and the birthrate declines slightly - but more tools and fun toys are created, and people follow the religion contentedly and religiously.
They treat each other excellently and the religion grows as more people rub themselves.
The one drawback to this religions is that the doorknobs to all of the temples are continuously wet and slimy.
Thank you for participating - please add fresh batteries when done. -
Okay, I wanted Norse too, and now I totally side with Egypt. Get out of my head, Siuil! D:> -
LOLOLOLOL Voods babe, you need a date...
But then if you're following Siul's God... maybe you're self satisfied and you don't need a date.
LMAO!
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Apollo. So I could ride around all day in my chariot around the sun.-
Any other reason?
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I believe Poetry was his domain.
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OK so NOW you are OFFICIALLY a PRIEST/PRIESTESS of your GOD.
WHAT IS YOUR FIRST RULE FOR HUMANS?
Keep in mind - the rule will affect the entire world.
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But in the Mediterranean world, outside of Judea and other Middle Eastern provinces of the Roman Empire, a monotheistic worldview would have been strange. People would have worshipped several gods and demi-gods and thought nothing of it.-
Culture snob!!!
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Exactly - MY point.
But now --- Let's imagine those 3 major LIFE and WORLDShaping Religions were your ONLY choices.
CHRIST has NOT been Born.
So those religions have continued on.
This is completely Imaginary - but I want to see which God/Goddess folks would choose and WHY. -
Allrighty then. The Snob says Bacchus! Woo hoo! Party!
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LMAO - such a SNOBBY choice..
OK - NOW -- You've picked him...
WHAT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LIFE would you HAVE to Change...
RIGHT NOW...
What do you have to change to fit into his RELIGION? -
Not much really. I help run a wine hotel and sell my own brand of wine, so I'm still looking out for #1!
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ROFLMAO - You guys...
Thank you...
Pick a specific God - and tell me why... ROFLMAO - sorry - I just woke up - I fixed the QUESTION - above... agggg.. -
TOGA TOGA
Because college was one hell of a good time
(the parts I can remember)-
I still HAVE Toga parties...
ROFLMAO
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AMON-RA -
OK --- NOW THAT YOU ALL HAVE PICKED YOUR NEW GOD OR GODDESS...
Tell me:
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO CHANGE (in your life today) to FIT into the new CHOICE of God or GODDESS?
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ok, now this is starting to involve research!
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LMAO - Siul - hold on - this is actually something I want to see...
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The answers... LOL - not the research.
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Apollo: Absolutely nothing. I radiate warmth like the sun and I've written two poems in my life (one incomplete).
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OK Gtally (add: and everyone who has chosen a God or Goddess) - you've become a PRIEST/PRIESTESS of High Rank now.
What is one rule you are you going to give the OTHER Followers?
Now - before you answer --- REMEMBER --- whatever RULE you give to your other followers CAN and WILL affect their lives - and quite possibly affect the ENTIRE world.
Because your followers are going to MAKE THAT RULE --- the ULTIMATE RULE as VERY important - and they will make rule VERY much the WORLD.
And it can cause war, famine and hatred.
So choose CAREFULLY - what is YOUR FIRST LAW/RULE?-
That they all must drink my wine. No exceptions.
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GTALLY
Everyone MUST drink your Wine - and no FREE Refills.
Now...
Here's the problem.
IF it is not free, what happens when someone cannot afford your wine?
Are they then thrown out of your Church/Temple/Following? -
Heck yeah! No freeloaders!
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Oh yeah. And no free refills. Your High Priest Commands It!
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Follow your own bent.
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LMAO!
OK - that is a RULE now for your followers.-
NP - Follow your own bent.
NOW you have rapists and murderers following your rule.
Here's a quick question. They ARE following your rule, but they are killing your followers and you are losing your income...
DO YOU INSTITUTE ANOTHER RULE - or do you allow them to continue plundering your flock? -
No new rules. I don't believe in spoiling anyone's fun, including rapists and murderers. And who the hell wants followers anyway. (Neither a follower nor a leader be.)
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OK - Your rapers and plunderers have killed everyone - so soon, you have NO followers... Without FOLLOWERS your religion dies out and you no longer have any money, food, place to live - you now are penniless.
Your God is Dead because you are the last person to follow, and cannot radiate his warmth or even finish his last poem. And the rapists and plunderers come to kill you.
Alas, your God is dead - and cannot help you.
NP - sorry - but your religion just died out...
Too bad.... -
Unfortunately your religion is the first to die out amongst everyone. Sorry.
But hey --- be thankful - you don't have to answer any more of my questions. LOL! -
Hey, this was your idea, not mine. I never had a religion in the first place. Besides, rape's not such a bad way to go. (Better than testicular cancer.)
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Now that was PROFOUND! LOL!
Nah -- It's my experiment. I just am determining if ALL religions are the same... Or how people would change things if they could... And what those changes could bring about.
NOT that I'm taking this seriously --- Just listening and learning... And laughing with some of the answers. Y'all are pretty funny folks and some of the answers are very interesting.
WW
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nothing. amon-re is also called 'lord of the silent', the god of the people, the one who hears the silent pleas of the masses.
ain't it familiar? our current religion, ages ago. -
Interesting Jtsantos- Very interesting.
So the God of your choice... He doesn't actually DO anything?-
Yeah, he's like the slacker of all the deities.
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The gods have me posting in the wrong place.
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But I wonder if he does anything with those pleas?
I mean - is it like crying into an empty cave?
I mean - why bother plea'ing - for anything - if you'll NEVER get anything from it?
(as in a waste of time?)
Seriously - is that all he did? Listen?
Couldn't he do anything about any of them?-
Yeah, the other gods think Amon-re needs to shape up, get serious about life and get a job!
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ROFLMAO!
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honestly, I really don't know. But then again, never heard of a deity that answered a plea outright... beats me.
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umm I didn't pick a specific god, but I would hope my High Priest/Priestess would give bonus afterlife points for doing beer bongs
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Well pick one.. I mean - you can't sit on the GodHood-Fence for too long.
Everyone does it.
*grin* -
I'm going with the greeks, I just dont want to be a priest, I want to be dominated.
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OK - half way there - now pick a god.... LMAO!
But no - you have to be nominated - you have to!
This is YOUR God.
And YOU --- YOU --- You have to make a rule.
Otherwise your god can't exist.
AND YOU KNOW your GOD/GODDESS is the RIGHT one.
The ONLY one.
*evil grin* -
Dominated... LMAO - sorry - I read NOMINATED.
Uhm.. well. Uhm... you don't have to be uhm dominated, unless you pick a dominatrix Goddess.
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The Moon!-
OK - which one is the moon?
Are ya thinkin' Athena?
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wagerwitch -- your god is the sacred ROFLMAO, who you keep invoking. i admire your piety!
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Oh - you have no idea how much my god rolls me on the floor.
In fact - in the other thread - Fictional Biblical S-E-X Positions He has me rolling right along.
Stinks to be me. *giggle*
Laughter and uhm Pleasure seem to be my God's Favorite things... And boy oh boy do I laugh alot.
Won't be discussing the pleasure part - except it's a pleasure to Worship.
*blush*-
yummy... LOL!
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Anubis.. I like Dogs-
Anubis... Good.
You have been promoted to High Anubis Court - you are the highest of the high. You have golden chalices, and beautiful surroundings, you control the followers.
NOW - make a rule that ALL Followers of Anubis MUST Follow.
Keep in mind that All laws and rules may affect the world.
What is your RULE? -
go fetch?
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what jtsantos said
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ROFLMAO - ok - so now you have a GROUP of people in this world teaching GO FETCH to every other human in the world.
WHAT HAPPENS when people do NOT GO FETCH?
Do they get punished? -
yes.. no doggie treats for a day
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So now they get no doggie treats for the day.
Anyone without a doggie treat is treated how?
Do they starve?
Do they die if they do not get their treats?
Do people ostracize them if they don't have their daily doggy treats? -
bah... this new god, new rules things is turning out to be too much work..
Simple rule from now.. go forth and multiply..
or divide.. or add/subtract.. or just stay away from math altogether -
OK - your people populate the earth and they start to overpopulate - but they are enjoying the populating part.
Your God gains many followers and YOU become RICH as people throw money at you.
BUT - because you cannot do math properly, you find that your accountant has run off with some of the profits to join the Baccus Crowd.
*GRIN*
Thank you for participating. -
damn.. I didn't really think this through.. I really wouldn't want my money lost due to bad math now..
After giving some thought, new rules :
The Ten "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts"
1. I'd really rather you didn't act like a sanctimonious holier-than-thou ass when describing my canine goodness. If some people don't believe in me, that's okay. Really, I'm not that vain. Besides, this isn't about them so don't change the subject.
2. I'd really rather you didn't use my existence as a means to oppress, subjugate, punish, eviscerate, and/or, you know, be mean to others. I don't require sacrifices, and purity is for drinking water, not people.
3. I'd really rather you didn't judge people for the way they look, or how they dress, or the way they talk, or, well, just play nice, okay? Oh, and get this into your thick heads: woman = person. man = person. Samey = Samey. One is not better than the other, unless we're talking about fashion and I'm sorry, but I gave that to women and some guys who know the difference between teal and fuchsia.
4. I'd really rather you didn't indulge in conduct that offends yourself, or your willing, consenting partner of legal age AND mental maturity. As for anyone who might object, I think the expression is "go fuck yourself," unless they find that offensive in which case they can turn off the TV for once and go on a walk for a change.
5. I'd really rather you didn't challenge the bigoted, misogynistic, hateful ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, then go after the bastards.
6. I'd really rather you didn't build multi-million dollar synagogues / churches / temples / mosques / shrines to my canine goodness when the money could be better spent (take your pick):
1. Ending poverty
2. Curing diseases
3. Living in peace, loving with passion, and lowering the cost of cable
I might be a complex-canine omniscient being, but I enjoy the simple things in life. I ought to know. I AM the creator.
7. I'd really rather you didn't go around telling people I talk to you. You're not that interesting. Get over yourself. And I told you to love your fellow man, can't you take a hint?
8. I'd really rather you didn't do unto others as you would have them do unto you if you are into, um, stuff that uses a lot of leather/lubricant/vaseline. If the other person is into it, however (pursuant to #4), then have at it, take pictures, and for the love of Mike, wear a CONDOM! Honestly, it's a piece of rubber. If I didn't want it to feel good when you did it I would have added spikes, or something.
and the most important ones
9. I'd really rather you didn't slack off during school. Go learn Mathematics, algebra and calculus. Be a good accountant and don't run off with my money.
10. I'd really rather you didn't go off and plagiarize the FSM gospel doing a search and replace for noodles/noodly with canine or something. Do some original work. That sort of work is solely reserved for all powerful beings like me. Got it? Repeat after me : No Cheating
Now, go forth and multiply...
Cavemen. -
Revival of Anubis is done and a mass exodus runs to get the goodies given out.
Also the term GO F YOURSELF becomes a common Greeting and way of saying Good Bye, Good health and every time someone sneezes.
Mathematics become top priority and high ranking priests manage to fill the coffers with lots of gold and gemstones.
Dog Biscuits are served with every glass of wine and Baccus Visits often to indulge corpulently with all of the women who offer their virginity to Anubis.
(and a few of the young men too... since Baccus seems to swing any way that pleases him.)
Thank you for participating - and those are actually some very good rules... Too bad other religions did not or have not used those as well.
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the greek gods, because I look like the statues, and I'm completely vain-
Pick one - this is an exercise for me.
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fine, Ares
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Alright - now you need to Please give me YOUR FIRST rule as the HIGH Priest of Ares.
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All attractive(as judged by me) women must help the population by carrying my spawn.
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As the Priest of Ares chooses amongst only the attractive women to carry his spawn a group of puppy-sacrificing teens descend upon the temple and began pilfering through the soon-to-be ruins.
They desire the most beautiful girl themselves, and when the Priest is not looking, they steal her.
In a fit of anger, the Priest utters Ares' name and points his finger towards the youths who hide the beauty behind their backs.
Ares, just waking up from his 13 year sleep in an Urn, screams in exultation and begins wanton destruction amongst the humans, regardless of their affiliation.
As the temple lays in Ruin and all dead, including the now slaughtered Priest, who still had his arms around one beautiful girl, Ares walks over to the wall, dips his finger in a pool of his Priest's blood and writes:
APHRODITE AND ARES SITTING IN A TREE
K
I
S
S
ING
and a big heart...
With his arrow, he shoots the wall of the temple and it crumbles into dust.
Ares smirks and walks into the clouds.
Thank you for participating. *GRIN*
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lol for the longest time I beleived in and followed greek gods, granted I was like 6 but still.... darn my mama for forcing me to read mythology at a young impressionable age. Athena is the woman! Though I was also fond of Ares-
OK - we've got Athena - the war goddess - right?
Now pick the VERY first RULE - you... as the priestess MUST incorporate amongst your followers. -
yep, they are both war gods. Eh I suppose my first rule would be to train the weaker humans so that all were on an even playing field, at least physically speaking.The purpose of this rule is not vanity, or even health, it's for good old school practicality. One on one combat, hunt and farm your own food, etc. If everyone is in peak physical condition then there is more of a possibility for a self sufficient order of Athena hehe
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Athena's Priestess invokes the training and all followers become experts in the ways of combat.
The temples are covered in blood as the war-lust breaks through each of them.
As the highest commander realizes that he can break rank, kill the priestesses and take over control, he is slaughtered by the second in command who has the same idea.
Unfortunately the Third in command also had the same idea as did the Fourth and the FIFTH and so on...
Until we come to the last surviving war lusted human being.
He stares out across the battlefield weak with hunger and need to kill and fight only to realize, he is the sole survivor.
He ponders whether he should have chosen Anubis or Bachus, but then realizes he couldn't parry his sword as quickly if he were trying to catch dog biscuits or if he were drunk.
In the end - the last human plunges himself on his sword because he has no one left to fight with and his goddess demanded that he be a fighter.
Alas, humanity has ended.
Thank you for participating!
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Awww no Celtic deities allowed?
Fine - Bastet would be (and already is) my choice. As for the rules - well everyone would have to be nice to cats and women! Simple really...-
OK - now you are announced as the PRIESTESS of the CAT GODDESS...
WHAT is your FIRST RULE for Mankind? -
as I said, everyone has to be nice to cats and women...
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Your rule, unfortunately is VERY easy to follow.
However, what if one is allergic to cats?
What happens when their allergy stops them from getting close?
Do you form a committee and threaten a war against them? -
If they're allergic, they should go worship another deity!
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OK.
Your Goddess is the Cat's Meow, people flock to scratch her back and pay her kitty treats.
Your followers are sleek and beautiful - treating women special and with loving kindness.
Your people flourish, but run into a problem with Anubis Followers.
But you have nothing to worry about because Anubis has no more cash flow, therefore cannot control any of the modern politics and your Goddess can purr contently amongst her flock.
Your Goddess only collects a small following, but flourishes well and your priests and priestesses are comfortable.
Thank you for participating - and for having a survival. -
yay!
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I would have to devote myself to the cult of Isis. Having a god you would actually want to sleep with is an important consideration when thinking about who to worship.
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You are now imbued with everything ISIS is... Including the cool arm bracelets.
You are now in CHARGE of the Cult of Isis.
Now... Since you are in Charge - you must make ONE RULE - that everyone MUST Follow.
What is your Rule? -
Well I would have to go with my own personal motto "Never stand up when you can sit down and never sit down when you can lay down"
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So now Isis Followers are lazy... and the world is in ruin because nothing gets fixed, nothing gets built and no one does anything.
They are obese and anyone who is not lazy is obviously not an ISIS worshipper.
What do you do with them?
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Just so you are ALL aware, I am conducting a personal experiment.
I want to see if ALL religions will eventually boil down to the same thing.
Your answers are often funny, amusing and sometimes a wiiiiiitle scary... LOL!
But - the end result is about the same.
WW -
Minerva, Goddess of Wisdom (aka, Athena)
As someone who believes profoundly in education and thought, it would hardly be otherwise. -
OK - what IS your FIRST RULE that you must pass out as the CONTROLLING GROUP of your GODDESS?
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@wagerwitch
Thou shalt THINK before thou acts. -
OK. This is NOT a bad rule - and it does not affect the world in bad ways.
However, it does not give your followers a reason to follow your goddess, as it does not "GIVE" them anything they can tangibly feel and soon they become disgruntled as they see the Bacchus God Followers getting Wine... The Anubis Followers getting Dog Biscuits.
Yet, before they leave your religion, they think about it.
Thank you for participating!
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I pick atheism. Theodorus the Atheist is a Greek philosopher from 300 BC who taught atheism, which means this is an option. If you don't like it, vote me off your island.-
Poodle's God has made him the HIGH PRIEST of the religion that means NO GOD exists.
Therefore Poodle does NOT have to make a rule, because there are no followers of a God that denies his own existence.
And since he was only a philosopher, he sat there thinking about Godhood, and decided no one needed just another God...
And since no one believed he existed anyway - they didn't bother to vote.
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If i was forced to choose a god/dess, i'd be very unhappy. No one should HAVE to worship anything/anyone.
But
I'd choose Charlotte Gainsbourg as my goddess... if I had to.-
Ayuh... Sorry - no God Story for you.
PICK A GOD... or Goddess. phhhbbbbbt.
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Venus, I think I like her -
OK now you're the High FORMAL chair of Venus...
Make a RULE for your congregation... -
can "everybody must wear diaphanous robes" be implemented?
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They can --- Is your God/Goddess Chosen? And is that YOUR rule?
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nope, my God was the boring Amon-Ra... but I do like that rule
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Oh that's right.
Well - AS THE AMUN-RA - who never answers and ONLY listens... PRIEST/PRIESTESS... YOU are literally the one in Power.
YOU - as the PRIEST/PRIESTESS - can make ANY rule... your reasons for the rules are your own. If the rule works for you... Then you can make it.
What happens to your world when you implement the rule, is a different story... Which depends much on my mood when I read your rule... *GIGGLE* -
then wearing diaphanous robes at all times is now effective immediately
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Amon-Ra Followers Flock to the temples and the thin, see through robes break the concentration of many of the praying masses - and Amun-Ra rolls his eyes continuously as prayers of "DANG LOOK AT THOSE, WOULD YA?" enter into his hearing range.
Since he cannot speak back, he watches silently as little boys invent new ways to stare up robes without mirrors.
Eventually, the flock grows in size as multiple orgies constantly happen. And Amun-Ra hears even more about the sizes and shapes of people under those diaphanous robes every second of every day... So much so, he appeals to Baccus to send him more and more wine.
Amun-Ra becomes a drunk and breaks his code of silence - scaring the holy heck out of all of his followers and asks his Priest to PLEASE stop letting the congregation have orgies in the temples.
Thank you for participating - and enjoy your next Toga Party! -
Going to bed shortly - so any other Gods or Goddesses arriving will be appropriately handled when I rise...
Sounds like Siul's God... LOL! -
Anyone else?
Please read your god/rule choices... to see how your world ended.
Thank you all for participating - this was very interesting for me.-
did you forget about mine?
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Nope *GRIN*
see above. Your Story was just completed.
I try to keep everyone's story in their own line. It's difficult to follow in real time but - to the new reader, it makes MUCH more sense.
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