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Should Spanking Children Be Illegal ?
Posted by gerryPlanetEarth • 8/25/09 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: spanking
The current government of New Zealand has outlawed the spanking of children...
Do you have any opinions on this ?
Do you spank your children ?
User Comments
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I smell trouble a brewing...-
LOL! -
LOL 2X -
LOL 3X -
LOLing harder than you
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I voted no - however there is a high child abuse/murder rate here so I can see what they're getting at.
But a smack or spank is normal parenting. Hitting is not (and is already a criminal offense)-
Why would the New Zealand government hold a referendum on this matter and ignore the results and wishes of its citizens ?
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Because its f*cked!
But i guess its to make it easier to lock up child abusers as they cant say "It was just a smack" anymore.
But how do you police something like a smack anyway?
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GERRY!!!!
WTF?!?!? -
@gerryplanetearth
My husband and I have been and continue to be caregiver for traumatized children. We do not strike them. I would also like to provide some more information.
- "Child spanking has been an issue in New Zealand politics since the 2006 beating deaths of twin 3-month-old boys led to passage of the 2007 law. The country had the third-most child deaths from maltreatment among 27 Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development nations, according to a 2003 report from the United Nations Committee on the Rights of the Child, which cited average annual deaths for 1994 to 1998.
Twenty-four countries have banned corporal punishment of children, including Spain, Germany and Israel, according to the Global Initiative to End All Corporal Punishment of Children." www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601080&sid=a3KirI9O4B2M
"Law reform to end corporal punishment involves removing any provisions authorising corporal punishment and removing any special defences that may exist, so that the criminal law on assault applies equally to any assault of a child, whether or not it is described as discipline. It is a fundamental principle of human rights - upheld in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, article 7 and in the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights, article 26 - that all are entitled to equal protection of the law without discrimination.
In some states the law is silent on corporal punishment of children, but nevertheless it is socially and legally accepted and therefore explicit prohibition is required."
www.endcorporalpunishment.org/pages/progress/global.html-
These cases do go beyond just a "hurry along on the backside" though. I believe boat oars and a aluminium baseball bat were used on the 3 year old for wetting the bed - something a child shouldnt be punished for in the first place.
There is a big difference between a smack on the bum and a severe beating/murder. The naughty step doesnt work all of the time and I dont believe that there is anything wrong with smack, however the punishment would have to fit the crime. I would never smack my child as a punishment for her hitting or lashing out for example. -
I agree with you that a smack on the thickly diapered bottom of a toddler, who is acting out is a far cry from physical assault. But there are those who assault children, injure them, and even kill them. Many of those who do assault children were themselves assaulted by their parents when they were children. Ironically, it's frequently those adults who were assaulted by their own parents who insist that they have the right to spank. What this is actually about is cycle of abuse that's passed from generation to generation and that's very hard to break.
I hope everyone is aware that this subject minus the country label has been discussed on this forum previously.
www.blogcatalog.com/discuss/search.php?q=spare+the+rod
www.blogcatalog.com/discuss/search.php?q=spanking -
I forgot to add that the last thread on this issue titled: Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child? was locked by Admin.
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I wasnt gonna go down this track, but.... there is also a cultural significance linked to the cases and advertising campaigns - whereby this culture believes that a beating is just a fact of life, it "toughens up" the younger generation. They're taught in a certain sense to show love with their fists.
I think what people are really worried about is that there will be a lot of false abuse claims and good parents will be prosecuted for diciplining their children. -
there is a HUGE difference between spankin a booty and beatin an ass...HUGE -
@timethief
""Child spanking has been an issue in New Zealand politics since the 2006 beating deaths of twin 3-month-old boys led to passage of the 2007 law."
Thanks for providing this information as this was not mentioned in any of the media reports I listened to...
Nonetheless I still find it bizarre and undemocratic that the New Zealand government would hold a referendum on this and then ignore the results and pass the law anyways...
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Here in the USA walmart employee(atleast when I worked there) are suppost to report it if they see it. You get reported for it if done out in public. But spare the rod and spoil the child. But I have seen people take it to far. (again being an EMT you see things you wish you could never see again) -
Here we go again...
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as a nun, i can do nothing more but support FREE, RANDOM spankings.
Hallelujah! -
Spare the rod spoil the child...has anyone seen the show j. Springer
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Anyone who disagrees with spanking bootys needs to turn channel 5 wmctv memphis 10... it just takes 1 loveing person to disipline. I think people need to open their eyes ... this statement is prolly fixxina get me in trouble,but if it makes 1 person think....
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Spanking builds real men. Hell, by the time I was 4 I didn't even feel it anymore. I would only cried so my mother would stop because she wasn't going to quit until she heard it. I built an ass of steel. One time I just refused to cry and that just made her spank harder, but the ass wouldn't give out. -
Well I don't spank my girls to hurt their bootys. I'm aiming to hurt their feelings and make them think about what they did wrong..I want them to have a jiminy cricket on their shoulders @ all timea
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I agree, I dont do it to hurt either, for me its a last resort to shock her more than anything so that she knows she's gone too far with her behavior
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If you are into spanking, never do it when angry, it will get out of hand and you will be unable to control yourself. Spanking is a deterrent measure, it should never be your main source of discipline.
Communicating with your child(ren) is always best, as they will grow up learning to function via communication instead of violence.
BTW...yelling is not a deterrant, it's easily tuned out and the yeller just ends up with a hoarse voice. -
My first born son is two years old and requires constant supervision...I cannot fathom spanking an infant...
I do not recall ever being spanked by my parents or grandparents but in public school I was spanked with a strap or yardstick a gazillion times although in retrospect I probably deserved it... -
most of today's children from non-3rd world countries deserve a damn good spanking every now and then. new zealand shouldn't outlaw it, instead, it should put into place laws regarding the beating of children. most kids at some point in their lives require a spanking. too many kids today are allowed to get away with such stupid or mean things because of parents' fears of going to jail or being considered a child abuser. i was only spanked once and only slapped once by mother (and that was in public at a k-mart) and i can say i deserved both.
the law should be: If it leaves a mark or breaks a bone, it's abuse.-
My mother did not know the difference between a spanking and a beating. She was the kind of person who, had spanking been outlawed, would not only have continued spanking, would have added intimidation to the event: "You tell anybody about this and I will give you a REAL beating when I get you alone!"
Banning does not stop people like this. Education may make a dent, however. Not the kind of education that aims at eliciting empathy for the child (I don't think this kind of person has any to elicit) or respect for the child's human rights (these people think respect should be earned...how does a 2 year old earn respect?), but the kind of education that gives such people alternative discipline tools. Laws must be in place to protect children, of course, but I think an outright ban on corporal punishment is throwing the baby out with the bathwater.
Where do we educate people as to methods of disciplining children? We don't teach potential parents how to care for their kids, how to fill their needs, but once they become parents, we jail them for doing it improperly? That sucks. My children were spanked as a "last resort." It was the punishment held in reserve for the worst offenses. Thanks to a stepmother who was very keen on alternative punishments and grandparents who did not use physical discipline, I learned many alternative methods of discipline and used them. But if I hadn't had the good luck to be raised in part by these people, I might very easily have become the child abuser my mother was simply because that would be what I knew.
Just banning corporal punishment will NOT make the problem go away and it could generate some serious problems with the next generation.
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There are many people who see spanking as the only option to make children do something like doing homework, eating food and to stop crying (spanking for stop crying. Sure, that's gonna happen). I personally know people who will ask the teachers to give a 'good one' if their child slacks in classroom. I have read many articles where teachers beat up kids for not paying attention in the class or not doing homework, and on many occasions these beating escalates and kids go deaf (on being slapped so hard). That's the most inhumane thing one could do, beating a child
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I don't have a problem with spanking. As long as its by the parents, I see nothing wrong with it. It's a good way of letting the kid know they've done something wrong. When they're still in nappies it means they don't even get hurt because of all that padding - it's just a jolt for them to realise, "Right, OK, what I did there was beyond the line".
My mum only ever spanked me three times and she can remember each occasion. Those three times were years apart though, once I had it once I knew I didn't want that to happen again so all she had to do was raise her hand in READINESS to spank and I'd behave. It's a good disciplining technique that doesn't actually hurt very much. Banning it in New Zealand seems a bit extreme. -
Outlaw Anger Discipline.
Outlaw Mental Cruelty.
Outlaw Parental Terrorism.
Outlaw Parental Indifference.
Outlaw Meanness.
My parents loved me, doted on me and they spanked me. They however used common sense when it came to spanking me or my siblings. I freely admit I deserved 85% of the spankings they dished out. Never were they intentionally cruel because I was so headstrong and disobedient, I suppose I figured I knew best. I turned out pretty well balanced with a healthy respect for my elders and societies rules. Plus they had the help of my Grandmother to help them with their four kids.
Many of today's parents are single, worn out, exhausted, have felt like losing hope or faith and do not have the support they need to raise their children, earn a living and take care of their homes. Tension and pressure is having a terrible effect on most people, and parents are really having to cope with more than the single or childless couples have to cope with.
There has to be effective punishment to discipline the children. This is a difficult choice. I will add that when they got rid of capitol punishment and stopped the majority of disciplinary actions both public and private, crime took a decided hike from 12% to about 50% and that is an estimate. There are benefits to controlling the population in a positive manner in order to keep them and everyone else safe.
After reading what I penned, I do not want to come off sounding like an ass. This subject is a problem in and of itself. Respect needs to be taught with tolerance and an easy hand. -
hell use an easy hand. don't hurt physically,hurt their feelings,so they know what they have done is wrong. spankin a booty only works in the first few years anyway. I much rather do it those first few years,rather than my girls going buck wild because I didn't disipline them when they should've been.
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I don't think a child should ever be beaten up for any reason whatsoever.
Imagine if our bosses believed that way about their employees, or the police used that theory for dealing with the citizenry "Once in a while you should beat someone up real good to keep them in line...let's get kenyantykoon today...we haven't given him a good beating in a while..."
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I think he's baiting someone...
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I think he may be from a Third World country and be serious.
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never know
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Spanking a child is highly immoral and un-ethical. It teaches the child to hate the parents and to not get caught next time. Talking to a child, punishing a child or trying to better understand the child works. Why hit your own blood? Or any child for that matter?-
I disagree.
ANY punishment, corporal or otherwise, motivates a kid to not get caught. And virtually everyone I know received spankings as a child and they don't hate their parents.
Not all children respond to talking, and there is a huge gap between understanding and disciplining a child...one is not the other.
If you have children and have managed to get them to adulthood as polite, responsible, compassionate human beings without having corporal punishment as part of your discipline tool kit, either you had unusually malleable children or you are simply a better human being than most of us...or both.
But I have this sneaking suspicion that you have never been kicked, bitten and punched by a small child having a meltdown because you said he could not have marshmallows for breakfast or refused to allow him to crush all the bags of potato chips in the supermarket...
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well babydoll,soon as you have kids you'll see. I don't mean that in a mean way either.
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I just look at it like this...
I vividly remember moments in my life when I was presented with a choice. Choose the first path, and I may experience a moment of youthful fun, but being as that my action would likely anger my father, was likely to wind up with me sitting red-arsed in my room crying.
Or
Choose to walk away/not engage in the activity and thus avoid said wrath.
Can't tell you how many potentially troubling things I was able to avoid thanks to the deterrant that was getting a swift spanking.
Being a parent now, my kids know that there are certain lines you don't cross. Act up and have a tantrum and you're likely to get a spanking - and it's an effective deterrent.
I look out at the endless seas of children who run around without fear of discipline or respect for rules and think to myself "a good swift smack in the arse would do many of these kids a world of good."
That being said - child abuse (which is different from just a "spanking" and ought not be immediately confused for being one and the same) is a real problem.
Any good parent knows that if you discipline your child, the important thing is not the force applied - a light spank will often suffice as it is the mental/emotional distress of being conscious that you have upset your primary caregiver that is the real deterrent to children. After all - they just want to be loved. Which is why it's important that after any discplining, whether just verbal or slightly more stern, that you discuss the sitution from a cause/effect standpoint and make sure they understand that while you can be angry with them, that doesn't mean you don't love them.
In fact, it's because you love them that you take the time/effort to discipline them (which believe me, from the parent's perspective is not the most rewarding of activities - but then again are job is not to be our kid's "best friend" - it's to be their roll models and teachers of all of life's lessons). -
LMAO!!! Oh GOD. My answer to this is TEHO...To Each His Own.
Period. -
To each his own, as Lotus says. Personally, I don't believe in it and would never do it. My parents never struck me and I never struck my daughter. When I was in high school I had a teacher who used to smack inattentive students on the palm of the hand with a ruler. When he tried to do it to me I walked out of the room. I was amazed my classmates let him get away with it. I attribute my sense of outrage at his actions to the fact that my parents taught me that hitting another human being is wrong. -
Whe I was young I got spankings...didn't like one bit!
Today children know the phone number to family services to put their parents in jail for child abuse.
So you tell me if spanking should become illegal. -
I think that as parents we needs to make, with the other parent, the best parenting decision we can. As long as other parents do that then I can and will respect their choices whether it's in regard to spanking, schooling, religion, how many children to have, whether they play sports, instruments, join scouting, wear make up, have chores or allowences, etc. As long as the children are not in danger then it's the parent's choice and no one else's beeswax. It's that easy to me, respect my family and I will respect your's... to a point. Spanking is not beating, beating is beyond wrong. Harm your child or anyone elses and you've got me and the law to face.
and no, I did not spank. We chose not to. -
I don't think spankings should become illegal.
For some children, it works.
But there is a huge difference between spanking a child and child abuse, where you beat the heck out of the kid.
Sadly, too many don't see the difference.
Besides, I don't want it illegal. I don't think the government should tell me how I should raise my child or how to correct him or her.
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