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Teacher student dating...
Posted by HollytheHousewife • 10 days ago • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: for, Hot, teacher
So one of our teachers just got caught with a student...
The teacher was 22,and the student 17.
Do you think he should be fired??
User Comments
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I wish I had some hot teachers -
No. -
Well when I was 17,I dated a 23 yr old cop,with my family's approval...almost married the dude,cept he took his power as a po po a little too serious.
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wow. that never happens *sarcasm*
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Of course.
No one in a position of authority should enter into a relationship with someone subject to that authority.
-Tiffany-
Why do u say that? What if she was into him? Like I said I was engaged to a cop,and my family to this day wishes I woulda married him.
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I don't think it matters if she wan into him or not. I assume the school has a code of conduct for their teachers and I would hope that dating a student would be against those rules. If a teacher breaks those rules, they should be fired. Having a relationship with a student is just a line that shouldn't be crossed. -
In high school, if the girl is not 18, it is by definition statutory rape in almost all jurisdictions. The chap won't just lose his job - he can and should be charged with a crime. Not only is the girl under age.... HE IS A TEACHER!!!!!
In university, the situation is somewhat different. We have very clear guidelines. If a lecturer or tutor is sleeping with a student and he is responsible for the marks she receives for essays, assignments and exams, all marks from him are cancelled and another member of staff has to assess her entire year's work. The couple can continue the relationship, if both sides want to, but he is NEVER allowed to be responsible for her academic progress (or otherwise) again.
Otherwise the university would be open to claims of favouritism, sexual exploitation, lack of transparency in marking standards and a dozen other charges.
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Well ever body here is like child molestor! I'm like girl is gonna be 18 in less than a month...how is that pedophilia?
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I think it's the nature of the teacher-student relationship that raises that concern. I doubt that most people would call a 22-year-old college student involved with a 17-year-old high school girl a pedophile. Many people would still consider it inappropriate, but not perverse, I don't think.
-Tiffany -
I don't see anyone here calling him a pedophile but the fact remains that Hels is absolutely correct. She is under age, he is not .. I don't think dating a student is the best idea for several reasons...
What if the relationship sours and she spreads dirt about him all over the school? What if she accuses him of rape? What would happen if other students hear of this and you get some girl, even younger thinking this is ok behaviour ...
I try not to judge but really, in a situation like this, you really need to consider all the possiblities that can occur at the drop of a hat.
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Well,I still don't think it an abuse of power...
When I was 17,I used to use my step-sis's ID and go clubbin,I even danced with a couple of my teachers...17 to 25 is all relative-
Just because you did it doesn't mean its ok.
I wouldn't want my kids to get involved with their teacher while still in high school. High school boys are bad enough.
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Realistically, yes he should be fired.
First of all, no matter what, she is still a minor.
Secondly, it's his job to teach not to flirt or bang the kids. I think a 22 year old high school teacher is never a good idea... EVER. He should have started his career with younger kids, elementary. I just don't think it's appropriate.-
that's dumb. If you go to college to teach high schoolers you teach high schoolers.
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Lotus, I agree with you about the potential problems, but in many states high school teachers have different licensing than elementary school teachers and cannot switch back and forth without obtaining another certificate.
-Tiffany -
I think 22 is too young to teach high schoolers. Period. That's my opinion as someone who is an education major and someone who has taught kids. No one has to agree with me.
@ Tiffany
I'm well aware of the certification requirements. But anyone who is going into the teaching field should be able to add 4 to their age and realize that starting out in high school would serve as a distraction to their students. JMO -
don't worry... no one does...
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This was actually a topic in one of my classes. I know for a fact several people agree.
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I think teachers of high school classes should NOT date their students. Not that I think the student cannot handle herself - but it causes all sorts of murky issues. Did she give sexual favors to get better grades? Is he treating her preferentially to other students? It's not enough to be innocent - but to avoid any appearance of being anything but innocent. Date someone else, or hold out until she's out of your class. -
But, Lotus, the vast majority of high school teachers are able to remember their jobs and treat their students like students, regardless of age. Meanwhile, those who don't aren't limited by age divisions. Debra LaFave springs to mind, as does the middle school principal whose name escapes me, but who "ran away" with a 12-year-old student. People who understand boundaries understand them; people who don't aren't going to behave better because there are a few more years between their ages.
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My reasons for younger teachers teaching younger grades isn't just to avoid molestation charges. Teaching is an overwhelming job, and as the students get older the challenges increase severely. I think for the sake of the students and the school, it's just a better idea for teachers who teach high school to be slightly older...at the VERY least 25 years old, ideally close to 30. Age divisions arent reletive until you get into a much larger age gap and then it's the school and the teachers job to familiarize themselves with the needs of their student's generation.
I wouldn't be surprised if some kinf of state regulations come out of these kinds of cases that create age requirements to teach jr's and seniors.
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I don't believe she was in his class. I think they met at fox and the hound
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Who seriously cares? If my daughter at 17 dates her 22yr old teacher - so long as he treats her with respect, what right do I have to stand in her way of potential happiness?
All that crap about teacher-student relationship blah blah is just that - crap. If she wants to bang him and he wants to bang her then let them be.-
Its innapropriate. The same as f*cking you boss is innapropriate. It brings about a lot of issue, and it's totally unprofessional. teachers are there to teach, not scope out chicks. I don't think I would mind either if my 17 year old daughter dated a 22 year old man. HOWEVER, I would severely question the integrity of a teacher who thought it appropriate to date a student, and wouldn't trust his character.
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Fucking your boss is not inappropriate if both are consenting adults.
Teachers are there to teach - but they still are alive human beings when they teach. They don`t stop existing or having human emotions or feelings when teaching.
I simply don`t see why being a teacher should stop two people dating who have a mutual attraction. -
I have waited a few days after reading othello's vulgar, insensitive response, before replying myself. To calm down.
BlogCatalog is for everyone, whether we agree with them or not. Sometimes the answers are agreeable, sometimes they are hilarious and sometimes they are awful. C'est la vie.. it is a big and diverse world!
I don't agree with HollytheHousewife on this discussion, but she has been thoughtful, polite and open to all shades of opinion. The concensus seems to be that the teacher should definitely lose his job according to the Education Department's code of conduct, but that he probably should not be charged with a crime if the girl was a] willing and b] almost of age.
Tiffany, Jaybetee, cantankerous, lotus, ekim, dani, pluto and everyone else seem to agree that the boundary separating the teaching authority from a sexual-social relationship is one that must never be crossed.
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And there's nothing in the world like having a teenage girl hold your career in the palm of her hand....Ready to crush it as soon as things go sideways in the relationship - which, they will - as soon as her grade has to be adjusted downward. They have a word for this: T R O U B L E !
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Well,it wasn't the girl who turned him in...they got a little too close in the backseat of a car at snowden grove park,haha!!!
Now there is more to the story,but it isn't gonna be on until tonight @ 10,but it said something about it being a consensual relationship...
Sor some reason I think her parents agreed with the realationship...we'll see... -
Leaglly, the age difference is not the issue, it's the teacher/student part that is.
A lot of people are blind to the damage that is being done here. A big part of grading is subjective, how can this guy NOT be biased? What good does that do HER? She is having her education interfered with here.
Is she going to grow up and think, "If I can't get a job or a raise, I'll just F my boss to get what I want"?
Yes, he should lose his job and never work as a teacher again. No, he's not a pedophile but he obviously doesn't take his job seriously. -
ouch, ummm as a teacher myself that is a huge NO NO, wait till they graduate and are 18 if you still want to pursue it then that's fine, and it won't affect your job, honestly with all the hoops you have to go through to become a teacher (at least in my area) why would you risk it? makes no sense to me-
Some people are just impetuous.
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She should've arranged to be transferred out of his class. If she cared about him at all she would've. Yes, professionalism is important and if you have such a personal problem with a status relationship you should consult your admin about moving the student to another class and waiting until after graduation.
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move the student? make it official? He will sooner be sacked
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chemistry would have been so much fun then!-
What are you cooking up in the lab? I'm outta here...
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I agree!!
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Well like I said she wasn't in his class,just a student at the school. I can agree with both points of veiw,I just hope he is still allowed to teach though. I hope this hasn't ruined his career.
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Fired?? What about jailed?
I understand how it could happen, but it's not OK. It may "feel" right, but it's wrong on so many levels!
Couldn't they just have waited a year until everyone's legal? Or until they are no longer teacher/student but two adults?? -
I teach undergraduate students and all of them are girls. but i don't think that i would date any of my students ... its too complicated.
in this case, it is inappropriate if the student is in the same class that the teacher teaches in. if the student belongs to a different school, then there should not be much of an issue.
is there objection about the girl being below 18 or is it about she being the student of the guy. because i have known quite a few teachers who have married their students ... -
no i dont think so he should be fired...
i dated my teacher last year...i was completing my diploma in auto and she was teaching me designs of engines...i was 19 and she was 24..i din found anything unacceptable in it...but ya her parents does and den she got married in few months...she was great..we are still good frnds.. -
This is why I had to give up teaching - even tho it was at the college level, the school had a policy against fraternizing with students and I just had too many cute students. So I quit and stayed in touch with them LMAO-
now m srsly ready to be ur next victim...lol..
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LOL I'm definitely NOT role model for young innocent girls LOL
as for the topic - I was 17 and lost my cherry to a 24 year old man - is it wrong for a young teacher to have a relationship with a student - yes, only because there's an implied division of authority that should be respected.
Do I have an issue with a 22 year old having a relationship with a 17 year old? How can I when my age gap was worse? At 17, I think you know what you're doing, versus some 13 year old kid screwing his teacher. -
u all teachers sounds same....i think u r rite.. but when i was 13 i wasn't aware of this things...ya i came to know when i was 14 though..but when i was in relationship i was 19 and knew what was wrong and rite...but dont know this heart just go zzzz....
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yes definitely! that's gave a bad impact to the student,... -
The age of consent for sexual activity in most places is 16 therefore at 17, she may not technically be a minor. She can sleep with whomever she wants as long as her partner is over the age of 16. The teacher cannot be charged with rape or child molestation unless the age of consent in that area is 18.
Should he be fired? Yes. Teachers, regardless if they are 1 year older or 40 years older, shouldn't be diddling the students. He's there to teach, not get his chicken choked. -
he is a teacher '--- shouldnt be messing with students -
This could be likened to some company policies that don't allow colleagues to date each other. Or the 'strictly business' therapist/client code. Couldn't. Shouldn't. Wouldn't. Well, guess what - this kind of stuff happens all the time. Not everyone gets caught though.
Does it bother me? Nope. What people do with their lives is none of my business.-
I don't think he should be fired... They're just two people who happen to have feelings just like any other two people have feelings too. As to whether or not he is going to be biased on her grades, that would be another story. -
sorry wrong spot
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@Aspot: I agree 100%.
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Of course the teacher should be fired, this is high school and the teachers are to be trusted role models for their students, guides. There should be written rules in case the individual teacher does not have a moral imperative to do the right thing. This really doesn't have anything to do with age it has to do with a situation in which the teacher has the power and the student does not. -
I'm sorry to say that I know of several people that dated students in the community and school district I now live in. This school district did nothing about it. I'm also sorry to say, one is still here teaching and coaching. He is on his 3rd marriage and has some serious ego and control issues. I can't believe he is still here tormenting girls and young women. He should have been fired. Teachers are supposed to be the adults, and realize what's right and wrong. Students and athletes look up to their teachers and coaches and naturally get close to them, anyone that takes advantage of this relationship is a predator. -
Yes, should be fired. Most states have laws saying that folks under the age of 18 are not yet to the age of consent, and I happen to agree with those laws. If you are older and so damn hell bent to screw around with a 17-year-old, then keep the clothes on for another year. Is that really so much to ask? Regardless, it's not me asking, rather it's the law demanding. Period.-
Laws...it has nothing to do with one's feelings...anybody can have relationship with anyone...there isn't ny law suggesting age barriers or status..god haven't made any law for that...this are the humans who make such laws...
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I do not believe it is wrong for a teacher and student to date as long as they do not do anything damaging to the school and themselves.
More and more students are experiencing openness to express their stand on an individual's right to date the person they love, even if that mutual attraction is between a teacher and student.
If the very purpose of the relationship is mutual attraction and not any other exploitive arrangements, then, I don't see why not. -
Not only is it illegal if the student is underaged, but it's incredibly unprofessional. Even in a college setting, it creates a sense of favoritism in the classroom. We had a few students who would babysit regularly for one of the professors.
So-- who got the high grades in the class? Who shared little in-jokes with the professor in front of the rest of the students, and would single out students they didn't like to pick on-- with the professor chiming in?
Um, no correlation, right?
Students are there for learning. Anything else tends to muck up that process and create a cliquish atmosphere that's counterproductive.-
come on...justify ur comment...y is it wrong??
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I think I was pretty thorough there, so I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt you were being funny.
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ohhh...thanx for dat...but i think u cant prove what u say...yes its right..
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And where is your "proof" that it's right? You indicated above you've dated a teacher, so your position isn't exactly unbiased.
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okay so u read it...grt..
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My personal opinion, take it or leave it, is that it saddens me to think that some teachers interrupt the development of a students education for their own gratification. Consent or not, teachers have the duty to uphold by example and show self control, not corrupt the minds of the younger less educated.
The young are very volnerable, and they should make their own mistakes through their own life experiences, not through the mistakes of their teachers. -
Personally if a 22 yr old or 25 yr old man came knocking on my door wanting to date my 17 year daughter(If I Had).
I would be questioning his intentions. Why would a man want to have a relationship with a girl that has not yet explored life and restrict her from her natural growth & development. She has everything to gain on her own, so why would a man want to date such a young girl?
I don't think I need to answer that question.
I would encourage my daughter to go out and enjoy life, travel, study, be childish and give her my support all the way.
Men like that should be shot DEAD! -
As long as the relationship is truly consensual I don't see any harm in it and any reason why anyone should interfere. It seems to me that our attitudes about sex are still awfully puritanical and punitive.
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@profound
Agreed.
And who says she didn't want it as much as he did? We always jump to conclusions and blame the guys and say that HE must've taken advantage of HER. Remember, there's always TWO people involved. -
@ NP
I couldn't be more agreeable to your thoughts.
There are still too many hypocrites, self-righteous finger waggers everywhere!
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The fact that they got "caught" would seem to say that they didn't have a relationship that was approved of by the guardian of the child.
The human emotions argument is weak! Would you blame the father for expressing his feelings for the teacher by commiting a homicide? It's just his human emotions that would want to make him express himself, right?-
Comparing sexual relations between a 17 year old and a 22 year old to homicide shows the extreme nature of our views about sex.
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"Comparing sexual relations between a 17 year old and a 22 year old to homicide shows the extreme nature of our views about sex."
I was more talking about using the excuse of "human emotions" to justify either having a relationship with a minor (which is illegal) or killing someone (which is also illegal).
If you want to have sex with minors under your supervision, go for it. -
Maybe some things that are "illegal" or "forbidden" shouldn't be. Not all laws are just laws or even make sense. That's the real question being posed in this thread, not whether the parties involved claim to be acting out of "human feelings."
Your concluding comment doesn't deserve a reply.
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I guess, I'm old fashioned, I agree.
Just wouldn't want my daughter to go to school and be hit on by a teacher when she's there to learn and if she hit on him then I would expect him to reject her and guide her well. Sorry!!! -
Ya know I didn't think of it that way...if it was one of my girls I guess I would have to open a can of u know what...haha...
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i don't think teachers and students should really date no matter what their age! my college advisor was asked to leave his previous job for dating one of his graduate advisees (she was 25 and he was 40 at the time)
it's not an issue of age (although... in this case it kind of is), it's an issue of power abuse.
i don't really have a problem with a 17-year-old dating a 23-year-old (when i was 19 my boyfriend was 31), it's the teacher part that gives me pause... yikes! -
The teacher should be reprimanded in some way. It's not about age it's the principle. When you are a teacher your supposed to be a role model. You are there to guide your students in the right direction and give them the tools they will need to live in society as mature adults. It's not a dating scene or social hour. It's a job in which that teacher is being paid to provide to instruct.
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