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- December 3rd, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Cookie Cutter Guilt
Let me just start by admitting: I try to impress 4-year olds. A couple of weeks ago we hosted one of those kids who makes preschool look like graduate school. She’s well-behaved and articulate ̵…
- November 30th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Blackalicious
Fern got this cute book on our last vacation -- Pinkalicious -- about a girl who eats too many pink cupcakes and turns, well, pink. Except she couldn't leave it at that -- Blackalicious beckoned.…
- November 26th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
I Wanna Make Banana Love
Fern is a crazy cook (see "cranberries, pickled") and today, schooled me in the right way to make a Banana Bread Pie.
- November 24th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Princess Frida
Let’s talk about lying to our children. No, I’m talking about how Fern thinks that Frida Kahlo is one of the Disney princesses, how Dora is in reality young Frida, and her brother Diego is Diego R…
- November 19th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Girl Fight!
I was secretly glad the shop ladies were arguing. Not because I’m one of those freaks who likes to watch conflict; in fact, I usually go out of my way to avoid it. But today we were in a cute store…
- November 10th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
The Shrieking Game
The game would still be deafening if I had girls who loathed each other. Except instead of screaming at each other, Fern and Claudia scream with each other. It’s a fine distinction. Claudia adores h…
- November 3rd, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Tomorrow Cometh
I saw the future yesterday, and it was this: Share care. The friends down the block came over for an hour because mom had a quick school meeting. And there was no (well, not very much) drama. The ki…
- October 29th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
My Three Fridas
The mystery of the Halloween costume is revealed: Fern (and Claudia, and my wife) are all dressing as Frida Kahlo. And before you ask (what everyone asks) whether “we” adults decided on that cos…
- October 28th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Weird Science
Minor inferno at lunchtime today. It was completely my fault — I lost track of the time and Fern hadn’t eaten in three hours. She was running on empty, and beside herself, screaming something…
- October 27th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Kitchen Fail of the Week
Every week, it seems, I perpetrate some new kitchen catastrophe, and this week’s entry is my pork-chicken-rice-egg-noodle casserole. She’s a way better cook. What the hell was I thinking?…
- October 26th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Baby Skid Marks
Pity the second child, again. She’s been to the playground maybe a dozen times in her whole life, when at her age her sister was there at least three times a week. On the blacktop One thing…
- October 22nd, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Monsters in Our Midst
Fern is nutso for Halloween, more than her birthday or Christmas, even. It’s not the candy, either — she has a bizarrely underdeveloped sweet tooth, and rarely finishes even a cookie, let alon…
- October 21st, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Mornings are for losers.
I’m delusional about free time. Every time I get some, I imagine that I’m going to be able to complete every little unfinished chore on my list, which, given the size of said list, leaves the rea…
- October 7th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Yet more evidence that my daughter is a teenager
Fern’s latest pattern is to sleep in until 10:30 or later, fall asleep by 9:30 (which has always been her usual), then be up in the middle of the night for a two-hour tea and cracker break. Oddl…
- October 5th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Pre-pre-teenage rebellion
In tenth grade, I once saw a cool kid wearing a collared shirt over another collared shirt. Although I was — then as now — completely ignorant of the arcane rules that make an outift fashi…
- October 1st, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Goat Baby
I’m sitting here, thinking, “Wow, the baby sure smells like a goat.” “Must be the sunscreen.” “Or the carrot puree that got in her hair.” “Or…” Oh, wait. Now I remember. Capri…
- September 30th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
The Only Thing I’ll Ever Do
I’ve been blogging for three years now… plus a week. I missed it because I don’t look at the calendar that much, but then again, why would I? I’m just a dad, after all. Boo channels Dolly…
- September 24th, 2009
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I want my pipe cleaner
I was once a master of minutiae. Where the hell is my sock? Ninja-like, I always knew where every little thing had gotten to. "Dad, where’s my other rainbow skull sock?" Fern…
- September 23rd, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Leaf Hoarder
I don’t like to pathologize kids’ quirks, but sometimes my daughter is a nutcase. Kissing a swallowtail. Fern’s always had a thing for nature, probably down to all the snails an…
- September 18th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Down With Princesses: Eight More Things I Never Thought I’d Say
“Did you know that fairy princesses grow up to be wicked witches?” (During a bath.) “I have to run into the bedroom for a minute. Keep talking so I’ll know you haven’t drowned.” …
- September 17th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Misguided Pride
I am proud of the weirdest things. I’m proud that Fern just hit 40 pounds and 3’ 6” tall (or 2.85 stone, 10.5 hands). So what if at a bare three-and-a-half years old she has already grown out o…
- September 16th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
‘Splaining Los Mocos
Maybe she’s only three, but Fern is frequently my adversary. As much as I try to avoid conflict — and let’s face it, some days I just don’t try that hard — she and I end up on oppos…
- September 15th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
My Daughter Debuts on flickr
Like so many parents, I’m quietly amused when my daughter steals my phone to take pictures. Hee, hee. self-portrait Even funnier is when she takes my oh-so-expensive real camera to fire off…
- September 14th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Blogging While Unhappy
People who read blogs — me included — tend to have so many on their lists that no one really misses one that goes dark for a week or four. I still get e-mails that start out something lik…
- September 2nd, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Thinking Outside the Shoe Box
Let’s start with the problem: “I have a blister on my heel but I want to wear my freakishly tight shoes anyway.” Dress Smart. Act Smart. I wish I could say it was my wisdom, my innate d…
- September 1st, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Bad, Worse, Worsted
My bad days probably don’t seem that bad from the outside: I bribe Fern with salty snacks to be quiet while I put the baby to bed, I miss a hair-brushing or a book-reading. Big deal, right? Chan…
- August 24th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Age Shock
You know how every dog year is supposed to equal something like seven in human terms? Ever since having kids I’m aging at a dog’s pace, too. Where’s my playdate? Yesterday the girls and…
- August 21st, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
It’s the little things
Some days I have to remind myself that for all my failings, I can, at least, stick a straw all the way through a potato. Poor spud. There’s a job for me in the weency-french-fry industry.
- August 19th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Thankful for Chair Covers
“Did you kiss the chair with a mouthful of watermelon?” “No, daddy!” Uh-huh.
- August 15th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Bedtime Routine
I’m told that you’re supposed to have a good routine to get 3-year olds to bed — bath, brush teeth, two stories, lights out, that sort of thing. Dancing around madly to Thriller is just as…
- August 14th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
On the Other Hand…
Into the woods. Note the fancy hiking boots. Some days I have the hardest times with what should be the easiest parenting calls. We’re on vacation; it’s our first day in the cabin,…
- August 12th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
The Cook and the Wiggle
Fern learned just today that her friend’s dad is named “Jeff.” Even before this she’s already been convinced that this particular friend — a new one — is imbued wi…
- July 29th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
My daughter, future cutter
From my conversation with Boo during a hike today. She’d earlier gotten a scratch on her foot. Cellphone cap of the window to the soul. “Sometimes I like boo-boos and sometime…
- July 21st, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Don’t Panic. Ever.
I used to get an adrenaline kick when a kid in my charge would invoke certain phrases — “I hit my head” or “it’s bleeding” or “I can see bone sticking out,…
- July 19th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Stick ‘em up
No one makes an uncomfortable position look more comfortable than a sleeping baby. There’s a lesson in that, somewhere.
- July 17th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Children are Crazy
I recently stumbled across a truism that instantly saved me from most of the emotional head-butting that had become a daily feature of my relationship with Boo: Children are crazy. Consider this m…
- July 10th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Buried in my own doo-doo
The affair of the flatulent leaf should have come as no great surprise. * * * One of my favorite tricks with kids is to use naughty language. (I learned this from a priest.) Not really naughty, of cou…
- July 9th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
XX Like Me
I’ve been so long immersed in this female-dominated profession that I hardly notice when I’m being treated like just another one of the ladies. The only time I feel truly conscious of my gender (a…
- July 6th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
You know what sucks?
It sucks when your baby daughter thinks that the bandage wrapped around the sea lion bite on your finger is the most fascinating and squeezable thing in all creation. Other things suck, too, but this…
- June 19th, 2009
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Boy Trouble
Boo fell in love again yesterday. Not to worry: it happens all the time. Happy about the swing or the company? It was the first summer meeting of Boo’s kiddie-acrobatics class and W–,…
- June 15th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
What if someone walks in?
“Paranoid Daddy” should have been in contention for my blog title: I spend an inordinate amount of time worrying about what my parenting would look like if someone just happened to walk in at any…
- June 12th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Nursery School Spy
Well, it took a week of nursery school, but Boo finally asked me about my sex life in front of all the other parents. Solo free climb up Mount Lots-of-Rocks We were sitting in the schoolyard…
- June 9th, 2009
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Toddlerstilsken
It’s after midnight and I’m wiping down the dining room table for the third time today. At three, Boo has mastered the skills necessary for fine dining but remains less interested in demon…
- June 7th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Dear Boobaby, part XL
Dear Boobaby, Images of Month XL We mostly use Roman numerals for these letters; that makes you XL months old. Extra large, indeed: every day you seem taller and bigger, m…
- June 3rd, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Blood and Crushing
Things were going fine on Boo’s first day of school until the blood. Sure, there was the usual craziness of introductions. Meeting a dozen new people (most of whom I’ll know for the next…
- June 1st, 2009
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“Butt Out!”
“My 3-year-old daughter just got clobbered by another little girl while waiting for the trapeze. And I’m not doing a thing about it.” This is not me. But that’s the issue my piece is in.…
- May 29th, 2009
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The Last Playdate
After months of agonizing about school — no-to-preschool, yes-to-preschool, crap-where’s-the-application-preschool — Boo finally starts at the local co-op nursery school on Monday. I…
- May 28th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
"Where are we going today, daddy?"
"Where are we going today, daddy?" Baby Day Planner reprise. (The year is 2007.) What startled me about the question was how long it had been since I’d heard it. From…
- May 27th, 2009
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Sweet Dreams are Made of This
Not the world’s best sleeper. This is a stupid thing to be worried about (as is most of what I worry about), but Boo’s never described a dream to me. Last night was especially dramatic: s…
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doodaddy has posted a new entry on: Doodaddy
Prop 8 This
I know I don’t usually go political on you — not since last year, anyway — but as a parent it seems irresponsible of me not to respond to the California Supreme Court’s decision yester…
