I read this book at an interesting point in my life where I was feeling completely at a loss as to what to do about my relationship. I had snagged myself a dream man. Handsome, insanely clever, with family and friends I liked, great dress sense, cultured and a great head of hair to boot. But it seemed that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't make him love me. He was inattentive, selfish and distant. He was busy with his own job and interests and I was last on the list of his priorities. So I read this book and followed some of it's advice. It didn't all work. In fact some of the consequences were a little disastrous. But it did make some good points.

Here are some nuggets from Sherry Argov and  how I related to them. 

“The more independent you are of him, the more interested he will be.” 
“The nice girl makes the mistake of being available all the time.” 
“Men don't respond to words. What they respond to is "no contact".” 

I thought that I would follow this advice by not texting my ex whilst he was away in San Diego. At first the response was good: "What's happened to my beautiful girl?" He text me. Delighted I made the mistake of texting him back. What I got next was radio silence for a bit and then finally an admission that he could only see me for 3 hours on his return before he had to head to a stag do. Fine I thought  I'll tell him it doesn't matter because I can't see him as I'm going out with one of my male friends from work for drinks. What I got in response was a message calling me childish and "purile". Then I phoned him and cried. Fail. Big fail. 

“When a woman acts as though she’s capable of everything, she gets stuck doing everything.” 

Yep. I ended up booking our entire holiday, rearranging his whole flat to fit in his grandfather's belongings and many other things. Did I get love in return? Hell no. 

“Many people lack the basic equipment to be in a relationship and there's nothing you can do to change it. You can't take a skunk and dip it in perfume and hope it becomes a puppy. Eventually, the perfume will wear off and you'll still have a skunk on your hands.” 
“If he still isn’t giving you what you want, the question to ask yourself is whether you really want him.” 

This is the most valuable advice in the whole book I feel. You can't change a man fundamentally at his core. He is either going to be the person who makes you happy or he isn't. It's the hardest thing to accept but it's the thing that women will fight against the longest. My ex had to go. It hurt. But now I'm happy again. But then this advice kinda negates the whole book doesn't it. They may as well make it a one page book with these lines on. Guess that wouldn't be such a big seller. Women need hope. But the truth is that a selfish man is a selfish man, just as a wrinkle is a wrinkle despite you lathering it in no7 Protect and Perfect face cream. 

I'm really not sure this book helped me much. But it did give me some strength when I felt sad and unappreciated. When he wouldn't text I'd take the book out and read about being a strong unavailable woman and feel better. So yeh, I did text him back much sooner than he text me but at least I didn't feel so bad waiting. So for that I give it a 5/10.